introducing renfred, the cute campus superstar
Saturday, March 04, 2006
regarding riots, i do know its negative effects. but, seeing that other countries have riots occurring so easily, what is it that prevented any riots in singapore? laws, work commitment, or simply not-in-our-blood?
horniness? no lah.. jus to blog my growing up n realising process.
=======================
been watching the ch8 idol contest. i din stay tuned to it, but at least saw who kena boot out. these ppl r still young. is tat y, they may not know anything abt acting? they jus have a passion for it, but not sure wat it entails? cos as an actor, u have to take care of ur every movement n gesture. i heard may phua teling them, every gesture has a motive. i find the word too heavy. i prefer purpose. using ur eyes, lips, facial, hands, body, legs. these all carry meaning when they move. n.. sometimes, when they boot out, they'll say, the stage let them experience the taste of life, n to see things from a diff view. haha.. well, i can say, as helpdesk person, i have been doing tat as well.
anyway, now i finally realise, why some ppl can experience a change in mindset after taking up a role. cos, when they take the role, they have to immerse themselves fully into the role. tink as tat person, feel n move like tat person. u have to really make urself into tat person to pull it off. u may have been ppl expericing certain stages of life. but without being thru it, u may not udnestand the emotions running inside them, n wat they r thinking of at the moment. n if u really manage to live in tat person's world, u could really b affected by his culture n mindset, until u lose ur original character, or u gain another perspective from his view...
=================
i've just collected my amei latest cd. when i saw her posters being pinned up in cd-rama wks ago, i suddenly felt like crying. it's been a long time since i saw her.. at all. it's like someone who i idolise, i have not been in touch wif her. den when i collected her cd, browsing thru the cd info, i almost wanna cry. it was like i am picking the things she left behind, without a word.
===============
seems like, it's my first time, to wait for so long b4 i buy somethign. i've oredi made up my mind to buy it liao. first time to actually still wait, b4 i purchase it, n wait for 1.5 mths still. cos my contract ending 7th mar. i'm tight now, i cant afford to b a spendthrift. have to wait till tmr 7th mar to get it.. wah long wait siazz.. but at least, i learnt to bide my time.. no need to rush into things to make it work.. sometimes, "good things come to those who wait" is true.. but, never forget, "opportunity never knocks twice" :)
horniness? no lah.. jus to blog my growing up n realising process.
=======================
been watching the ch8 idol contest. i din stay tuned to it, but at least saw who kena boot out. these ppl r still young. is tat y, they may not know anything abt acting? they jus have a passion for it, but not sure wat it entails? cos as an actor, u have to take care of ur every movement n gesture. i heard may phua teling them, every gesture has a motive. i find the word too heavy. i prefer purpose. using ur eyes, lips, facial, hands, body, legs. these all carry meaning when they move. n.. sometimes, when they boot out, they'll say, the stage let them experience the taste of life, n to see things from a diff view. haha.. well, i can say, as helpdesk person, i have been doing tat as well.
anyway, now i finally realise, why some ppl can experience a change in mindset after taking up a role. cos, when they take the role, they have to immerse themselves fully into the role. tink as tat person, feel n move like tat person. u have to really make urself into tat person to pull it off. u may have been ppl expericing certain stages of life. but without being thru it, u may not udnestand the emotions running inside them, n wat they r thinking of at the moment. n if u really manage to live in tat person's world, u could really b affected by his culture n mindset, until u lose ur original character, or u gain another perspective from his view...
=================
i've just collected my amei latest cd. when i saw her posters being pinned up in cd-rama wks ago, i suddenly felt like crying. it's been a long time since i saw her.. at all. it's like someone who i idolise, i have not been in touch wif her. den when i collected her cd, browsing thru the cd info, i almost wanna cry. it was like i am picking the things she left behind, without a word.
===============
seems like, it's my first time, to wait for so long b4 i buy somethign. i've oredi made up my mind to buy it liao. first time to actually still wait, b4 i purchase it, n wait for 1.5 mths still. cos my contract ending 7th mar. i'm tight now, i cant afford to b a spendthrift. have to wait till tmr 7th mar to get it.. wah long wait siazz.. but at least, i learnt to bide my time.. no need to rush into things to make it work.. sometimes, "good things come to those who wait" is true.. but, never forget, "opportunity never knocks twice" :)
Thursday, March 02, 2006
shld i rejoice? do i sound evil if i do? cos.. the snr really losing pop here. wat piss mi is (seem like i din blog tis), last night, i was checking a case. the ph rang. she simply got ready to go toilet, din bother to pick ph. she on way to study yes. but so?? den the jnr, she need to buy dinner. so she told mi she need to go down. u know wat, the snr whispered "if he cant wait for 5 mins, kick him out" jokingly. i rebuted "hey, 5 min oni, den u wait lah" she said "cannot lah, i got class ah". i said "i oso meeting my frns mah". she diamz.
n den, ytday (wed), she's kinda quiet all teh way. din tok at all. den today, even more power. we din tok at all. she dun wan listen to wat i say lol.. n friday, i officially announce that, she's really not toking to mi hahaha.. i can't say i've won any battle, but at least, she finally din try to criticise mi anymore. but i hope, it does not mean my pop lvl gone down...
on friday, she started 2 b the troubleshooter for problems. 1 case, the person called m b4. i know details. the developer knw tat i have the details. but she jus dun bother to ask. later i inform developer, she silently went off... hahah... den, in morning, she ask whether i have updated a daily xls file. usually.. our attitude is update when we like. but tat morn, she specifically ask mi (tat wk, all of us were supposed to update. jus tat i am in chrage of the xls the day b4 - thurs) whether i updated anot. i told her, i jus did, n she is stunned.
sighzz.. den KK.. wah liao.. nothign to say abt him anymore... ju tired of it. n i can see, how words can make 1 flare up on the EQ side. cos, for a simple task, he keep doing his own way whcih does not work. but he die die wan it. den i told him the proper way for 3rd time, he say better to document it down. i knw he jus wanna play punk, so i ask him to type out while i say. den.. u know, next few days, he still din follow docu. i immediately told him to READ THRU the ENTIre notepad. n he was stunned n unconvinced. i'm bad huh? sighzz (yes, again), our work environment now.. really sucks to the core. when i first joined, jnr n lady go lunch together. mi snr n tech guy lunch. lady gone, KK come in. so KK go wif jnr instead. den later, tech guy leave. leaving mi n snr. but we cant click. so, sometimes, snr find her kaki (last min den say) n i go myself. den comes the new ger. wif the new ger, i can click wif her totally. for lunch hrs, it's odd. now, i n new ger go lunch. if jnr not around, KK go himself, n snr go find her kaki. if jnr n KK around, jnr go wif KK. if jnr n snr around, they go SEPARATELY. nvr together.
den these days, snr like wanna build rapport wif jnr n new ger. but she knw she cant clikc wif the eng speaking KK, so she dun bother. Yet? dunno. on thur, after work, KK n snr n jnr stay back do work. jnr abt to go. snr ask her wait for her. jnr went off to toilet first, but snr kan cheong, call jnr come back. DEN, snr went toilet herself. the jnr, while waiting, ask us, wat to do, cos she dun wan go wif snr.. but 2 bad, after she ask this, snr came back in.. n off they went...
den ytday (fri), new ger asking if i ready to go. den snr oso abt to leave liao. i told new ger, i go toilet first. when i came out, new ger msg mi "they go first". hahah.. well, naturally, the first thot tat came my mind, is snr simply dun wan mi to tag along. heeh, on the surface, our helpdesk is working seamlessly... but in fact... haah.. is this the usual situation? well, it's my first time to stay somewhere for 1 yr leh..
oh ya, i've just made another blog for my work related stuff.. jus created oni. i cant let ppl know abt my personal life so easily, but i have to catch up wif the internet tech oso. haha, but am i following the footsteps of my gal pal? duno yet. she had it some time back. but i jus felt its need, so i created.
n den, ytday (wed), she's kinda quiet all teh way. din tok at all. den today, even more power. we din tok at all. she dun wan listen to wat i say lol.. n friday, i officially announce that, she's really not toking to mi hahaha.. i can't say i've won any battle, but at least, she finally din try to criticise mi anymore. but i hope, it does not mean my pop lvl gone down...
on friday, she started 2 b the troubleshooter for problems. 1 case, the person called m b4. i know details. the developer knw tat i have the details. but she jus dun bother to ask. later i inform developer, she silently went off... hahah... den, in morning, she ask whether i have updated a daily xls file. usually.. our attitude is update when we like. but tat morn, she specifically ask mi (tat wk, all of us were supposed to update. jus tat i am in chrage of the xls the day b4 - thurs) whether i updated anot. i told her, i jus did, n she is stunned.
sighzz.. den KK.. wah liao.. nothign to say abt him anymore... ju tired of it. n i can see, how words can make 1 flare up on the EQ side. cos, for a simple task, he keep doing his own way whcih does not work. but he die die wan it. den i told him the proper way for 3rd time, he say better to document it down. i knw he jus wanna play punk, so i ask him to type out while i say. den.. u know, next few days, he still din follow docu. i immediately told him to READ THRU the ENTIre notepad. n he was stunned n unconvinced. i'm bad huh? sighzz (yes, again), our work environment now.. really sucks to the core. when i first joined, jnr n lady go lunch together. mi snr n tech guy lunch. lady gone, KK come in. so KK go wif jnr instead. den later, tech guy leave. leaving mi n snr. but we cant click. so, sometimes, snr find her kaki (last min den say) n i go myself. den comes the new ger. wif the new ger, i can click wif her totally. for lunch hrs, it's odd. now, i n new ger go lunch. if jnr not around, KK go himself, n snr go find her kaki. if jnr n KK around, jnr go wif KK. if jnr n snr around, they go SEPARATELY. nvr together.
den these days, snr like wanna build rapport wif jnr n new ger. but she knw she cant clikc wif the eng speaking KK, so she dun bother. Yet? dunno. on thur, after work, KK n snr n jnr stay back do work. jnr abt to go. snr ask her wait for her. jnr went off to toilet first, but snr kan cheong, call jnr come back. DEN, snr went toilet herself. the jnr, while waiting, ask us, wat to do, cos she dun wan go wif snr.. but 2 bad, after she ask this, snr came back in.. n off they went...
den ytday (fri), new ger asking if i ready to go. den snr oso abt to leave liao. i told new ger, i go toilet first. when i came out, new ger msg mi "they go first". hahah.. well, naturally, the first thot tat came my mind, is snr simply dun wan mi to tag along. heeh, on the surface, our helpdesk is working seamlessly... but in fact... haah.. is this the usual situation? well, it's my first time to stay somewhere for 1 yr leh..
oh ya, i've just made another blog for my work related stuff.. jus created oni. i cant let ppl know abt my personal life so easily, but i have to catch up wif the internet tech oso. haha, but am i following the footsteps of my gal pal? duno yet. she had it some time back. but i jus felt its need, so i created.
Wednesday, March 01, 2006
my gal pal mentioned tat, my stds for guys have kinda dropped. i wonder, does it happen to everyone, as they advance in age? when I was younger, (hereby, i shall speak the truth, cos it's indeed my growing up phase. if anyone choose to discriminate me just 'cos of the truth, I am unable to help it.) i had dreams of going out n settling down with gorgeous guys. these include bengs (yes i still LOVE them to the MAX), cuties n watever. i din even pay attention to ppl who look older, or try to "pick" mi up, unless they look great. however, as i grow older, i realise tat, y do i simply pick on good looking guys? some of them cant even hold a proper conversation. brains, or brawns? pick 1, not both. if not, they will have an attitude wif themselves. "I'm good looking, tat y u tok to mi. i have loads of frns, why shld i bother about u?" or "i think u are interested in my body, but i'm not. dun come and disturb mi. i have better things to do than entertaining u. hey, where's tat hot dude??"
but 2 things have changed my mindset/thinking.
1) everyone wants to know cuties. and if possible, either have physical interaction or know them better. or simply look at every inch of the body outline, formed the clothes they wear. i oso wan. since i wan to do this to ppl. ppl oso will want to ogle at me. it's a mere exchange of interested looks. come on, if no 1 bothers to look, what's ur market value?? tat's y, nowadays, anyone who cares to chat wif mi, i'll try to strike a converastion wif them. if it lasts, a new frnship will b formed. if not, at least i know, he's either acquaintance, or a hi-bye frn (i'm still not used to tis term). if i tok to a person, i normally will want to have a proper chat. if he can't make it, den i'll know he's oni a goodlooker.
2) frns have no boundaries. dun everytime think of ppl are wanna bed u. ya lah, tis is flawful. but then, if u really no interest, u can still stay as frns wif them. who knows, they may turn out to b the frns u need most.
==============
err, somehow i deviated from my original topic :P ok.. when i was younger, i dreamt of knwoing gorgeous guys. den now, my choice of guys r either getting wider, or the population is getting more metrosexual, or my std has gone down. either way, wat i wan say is, is it true tat, when u r still glowing, u have certain stds of Mr Right. However, as ur glow dims, ur std gets lower, cos u r still finding that Right. until a pt when u realise u really adv a lot in age, but u still single, u jus wnana find a person who can b there for u, n all the fantasies of sparks glamourous fireworks will jus disappear? is this happening to mi?
was watching channel u's love match game. a ger gets to choose who she wann dine wif. n the guy can choose his date oso. ger A choose cute23. cute32 choose ger B. so 3some dine. gerA choose cute23 cos she likes him. gerA looks older than her age of 23. gerB looks her age of 23. den at the end of the show, gerA ask cute23 his opinions of her. cute23 say she a pistachio (kai xin guo aka happy fruit) cos she is always smiling and it warm his heart oso. in the end, cute23 goes for gerA. cos he's comfy wif her presence. i wonder... a lot of things.. is gerB ready for a chat? did cute23 choose gerA for the tv show effect? is cute23 comfy wif the looks of gerA? btw, i gave the cute23 not 'cos he's cute, but oni to refer easily.
after the CNY, i changed my camera bag to crumpler bag for style. but over 1 mth, it seem to bring bad luck... u know.. 3 incidents.
1) CNY dinner wif frns (i forgot if i changed my camera bag liao anot), it was on a wkday. i supposed to take pix as usual wif them. but end up, no pix taken, cos they bz wif eating. i oni took pix of fireworks.
2) he's someone who i almost did something wif. we met for 2nd time. n i asked if he wanna take pic. he declined.
3) worst case. my frn's bday. on the day iself, i bring camera along. called him to confirm timing, he say things turned out badly. i suggested meeting him up for dinner. he said he'll think abt it. later he declined still.
so jialutz?? am i really not fated to use stylo bags?? unless it's really my choice??
i remember, when i had plans for the future, i look forward to it pretty much... like getting new job (i basically spent my days sending out resumes siazzz), n preparing my oz trip. den, everytime after that objective has been met, i'll kinda feel that my time is empty. i dun have much things to look forward to. nothing for mi to prepare for..sigh.. i think i better try to find other objectives..
but 2 things have changed my mindset/thinking.
1) everyone wants to know cuties. and if possible, either have physical interaction or know them better. or simply look at every inch of the body outline, formed the clothes they wear. i oso wan. since i wan to do this to ppl. ppl oso will want to ogle at me. it's a mere exchange of interested looks. come on, if no 1 bothers to look, what's ur market value?? tat's y, nowadays, anyone who cares to chat wif mi, i'll try to strike a converastion wif them. if it lasts, a new frnship will b formed. if not, at least i know, he's either acquaintance, or a hi-bye frn (i'm still not used to tis term). if i tok to a person, i normally will want to have a proper chat. if he can't make it, den i'll know he's oni a goodlooker.
2) frns have no boundaries. dun everytime think of ppl are wanna bed u. ya lah, tis is flawful. but then, if u really no interest, u can still stay as frns wif them. who knows, they may turn out to b the frns u need most.
==============
err, somehow i deviated from my original topic :P ok.. when i was younger, i dreamt of knwoing gorgeous guys. den now, my choice of guys r either getting wider, or the population is getting more metrosexual, or my std has gone down. either way, wat i wan say is, is it true tat, when u r still glowing, u have certain stds of Mr Right. However, as ur glow dims, ur std gets lower, cos u r still finding that Right. until a pt when u realise u really adv a lot in age, but u still single, u jus wnana find a person who can b there for u, n all the fantasies of sparks glamourous fireworks will jus disappear? is this happening to mi?
was watching channel u's love match game. a ger gets to choose who she wann dine wif. n the guy can choose his date oso. ger A choose cute23. cute32 choose ger B. so 3some dine. gerA choose cute23 cos she likes him. gerA looks older than her age of 23. gerB looks her age of 23. den at the end of the show, gerA ask cute23 his opinions of her. cute23 say she a pistachio (kai xin guo aka happy fruit) cos she is always smiling and it warm his heart oso. in the end, cute23 goes for gerA. cos he's comfy wif her presence. i wonder... a lot of things.. is gerB ready for a chat? did cute23 choose gerA for the tv show effect? is cute23 comfy wif the looks of gerA? btw, i gave the cute23 not 'cos he's cute, but oni to refer easily.
after the CNY, i changed my camera bag to crumpler bag for style. but over 1 mth, it seem to bring bad luck... u know.. 3 incidents.
1) CNY dinner wif frns (i forgot if i changed my camera bag liao anot), it was on a wkday. i supposed to take pix as usual wif them. but end up, no pix taken, cos they bz wif eating. i oni took pix of fireworks.
2) he's someone who i almost did something wif. we met for 2nd time. n i asked if he wanna take pic. he declined.
3) worst case. my frn's bday. on the day iself, i bring camera along. called him to confirm timing, he say things turned out badly. i suggested meeting him up for dinner. he said he'll think abt it. later he declined still.
so jialutz?? am i really not fated to use stylo bags?? unless it's really my choice??
i remember, when i had plans for the future, i look forward to it pretty much... like getting new job (i basically spent my days sending out resumes siazzz), n preparing my oz trip. den, everytime after that objective has been met, i'll kinda feel that my time is empty. i dun have much things to look forward to. nothing for mi to prepare for..sigh.. i think i better try to find other objectives..
Monday, February 27, 2006
waiting "patiently" for 7th March to come.
these days, i've been kinda doing something not correct to myself. dun think 2 much lah.. it'c just tat i've been getting honry these days. den.. when i see ppl online, who meet my minimum requirements, i dun mind them coming over to my plc. i know it's too cheap for mi to b so. but somehow, when u r honry, can u think / bother so much?? but when u recover from ur moment of folly, u may regret it. tat u were so loose in ur selection.
so now, following maggie cheung's footstep (like real), i'll not volunteer or hint my intentions abt my honriness.. or perhaps, i wun suggest... perhaps will oni say my mood.. like "i'm honry".. but i shan't suggest any1 to come over. i'll suppress it, n tok normal wif ppl, but if they are sincere in "sharing the joy" wif mi, haha... :)
in the past, when i was still livign wif my family, i kinda din have any stds for meeting ppl. they dun have pic, nvm 1. come over, as long as body type ok, i dun mind doing things wif them, cos i am enjoying it. but now, i find tat i was torturing my body. perhaps i realyl looking jus for a channel to release myself. almost like a pro who have sex wif any1, who have the money. but for mi, it's for the sheer boredom n high sex drive. i hope it's not 2 late to ... make amends hahaha..
n soon.. i think i will b writing a letter to TODAY...
these days, i've been kinda doing something not correct to myself. dun think 2 much lah.. it'c just tat i've been getting honry these days. den.. when i see ppl online, who meet my minimum requirements, i dun mind them coming over to my plc. i know it's too cheap for mi to b so. but somehow, when u r honry, can u think / bother so much?? but when u recover from ur moment of folly, u may regret it. tat u were so loose in ur selection.
so now, following maggie cheung's footstep (like real), i'll not volunteer or hint my intentions abt my honriness.. or perhaps, i wun suggest... perhaps will oni say my mood.. like "i'm honry".. but i shan't suggest any1 to come over. i'll suppress it, n tok normal wif ppl, but if they are sincere in "sharing the joy" wif mi, haha... :)
in the past, when i was still livign wif my family, i kinda din have any stds for meeting ppl. they dun have pic, nvm 1. come over, as long as body type ok, i dun mind doing things wif them, cos i am enjoying it. but now, i find tat i was torturing my body. perhaps i realyl looking jus for a channel to release myself. almost like a pro who have sex wif any1, who have the money. but for mi, it's for the sheer boredom n high sex drive. i hope it's not 2 late to ... make amends hahaha..
n soon.. i think i will b writing a letter to TODAY...
oh well.. i'm disappointed with liu xiao zhou. he failed my expectations BIG time.
i have a strange feeling today. my family went to bugis to ask for better fortune. the old ladies there prayed for us. she took out a piece of standard drawing. of 5 characters (due to religious reasons, i shant describe them). she chanted. i felt a surge of emotions. some kind of remorse? i wanna weep... but i din.
den, when mine's done, i stood at a corner, and saw a room of statues. i looked at them, n my heart atuomatically started chanting a line for calming of the heart..
=============
i admit i'm not gd at making frns, or even good at maintaining frnship wif new ppl. there is tis person from fridae. he look quite alright, jus alright oni. he msg mi in fridae for a quickie (really, cos he str8-4ward, ask mi if i wanna fun wif him). we exchange fri msg, n he gave mi his number. i sms him promptly.
he din reply. later, i add him in msn. he came home, i msg him. he say he's tired, n wanna slp. from den on, i did see him online in msn. no msg from him at all. nothign at all. den jus now, he msn mi, saying my msn pic is hot, and he WANT IT. i say i dun give msn pic to ppl who i seldom tok to. he say it's jus internet pic, not mine. he den suggested tat, we supposed to meet up still. i den gave him my number, n my sign name. he unhappyy.
den i qn him, he din reply my sms tat day. why? he gave mi some non-sensical reason: maybe he was usign work ph, my number, saved in hp, so when change ph, the number din appear properly. i reply, he enver had my numer/name all along. he den say he's sorry. den i told him, basicall,y i'm unhappy tat he din reply my sms, n msn oso. den he insisted he's sorry oredi. if i dun accept, den whole thing can b forgotten.
i den said, if he chose to forget the whole thing, fine. if not, we can still start off wif sms to rebuild the whole thing. he declined. alright den.
i think this is the meaning of saying sorry. Did he really mean to say it, or jus as courtesy?? sorry does not mean, jus saying so, but u have to prove/show y u think u r saying it. if u sorry liao, but still carry on ur attitude, wat diff it make??
i have a strange feeling today. my family went to bugis to ask for better fortune. the old ladies there prayed for us. she took out a piece of standard drawing. of 5 characters (due to religious reasons, i shant describe them). she chanted. i felt a surge of emotions. some kind of remorse? i wanna weep... but i din.
den, when mine's done, i stood at a corner, and saw a room of statues. i looked at them, n my heart atuomatically started chanting a line for calming of the heart..
=============
i admit i'm not gd at making frns, or even good at maintaining frnship wif new ppl. there is tis person from fridae. he look quite alright, jus alright oni. he msg mi in fridae for a quickie (really, cos he str8-4ward, ask mi if i wanna fun wif him). we exchange fri msg, n he gave mi his number. i sms him promptly.
he din reply. later, i add him in msn. he came home, i msg him. he say he's tired, n wanna slp. from den on, i did see him online in msn. no msg from him at all. nothign at all. den jus now, he msn mi, saying my msn pic is hot, and he WANT IT. i say i dun give msn pic to ppl who i seldom tok to. he say it's jus internet pic, not mine. he den suggested tat, we supposed to meet up still. i den gave him my number, n my sign name. he unhappyy.
den i qn him, he din reply my sms tat day. why? he gave mi some non-sensical reason: maybe he was usign work ph, my number, saved in hp, so when change ph, the number din appear properly. i reply, he enver had my numer/name all along. he den say he's sorry. den i told him, basicall,y i'm unhappy tat he din reply my sms, n msn oso. den he insisted he's sorry oredi. if i dun accept, den whole thing can b forgotten.
i den said, if he chose to forget the whole thing, fine. if not, we can still start off wif sms to rebuild the whole thing. he declined. alright den.
i think this is the meaning of saying sorry. Did he really mean to say it, or jus as courtesy?? sorry does not mean, jus saying so, but u have to prove/show y u think u r saying it. if u sorry liao, but still carry on ur attitude, wat diff it make??
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