(quite a lot of things to say today)
Location: home
was thnking of blogging happenings of the day... but suddenly VELI hungry, eat the laksa instant mee, oso not veli full yet.. damn.

so funnie, sent a heart to someone in fridae, den he returned it, n realised we jus live beside ech other. n met up wif him on 2nd day haah... wow, his hse has quite a lot of dogs siazz.. din expect hdb area to keep so many dogs.

i supposed to meet a sec frn for dinner.. cos we both long time no go out liao. den took the chance/time to meet up. cos it;s my FIRST time to meet him oni among our sec frns, i find it refreshing... n the first 1 hr we met, he was quite reserved. probably due to us not so close kind. during our dinner, we toked a bit... i told him b4 abt my plan to go into financial planning aka insurance. or rather, discussed. den hor, suddenly, he intro mi to MLM. i was zat teo. i know i totally not keen in it. but he IS PERSISTENT. keep asking mi n persuading mi. he was almost like just repeating his line... unknowingly lah.. n i know to make $$, he wun give up so easily. so i decided to go wif him to the seminar... so tat at least he will give up on mi.

got there, and visited here there. i simply not keen loh. so jus casually tok to them. i know i not good at acting, but oni good wif words. but i still tried. i got bad exp wif MLM but i told the ppl i nvr tried MLM. but i forgot 1 thing. dunno if they discovered anot lah. later i really rejected my frn intro n just wanna go off. i gave the excuse tat i not free. as we left the plc, i knw tat, if this frn cant ctrl his eq, it means he'll b veli quiet, cos he just lost a biz deal. but he did tok to mi loh.

i have a lot of things to tell him, but it's pretty hurtting, so prefer to keep within mi. now i knw y ppl wanna shun such MLM ppl. n i understand my frns' intentions when i wanna go in the other time. back home, he msn mi: how much is 2nd hand stuff. i feel tat, somehow he seem to test water oni. testing if i still reply him n take him as frn. he did oso tell mi usual stuff like "he take mi a frn so intro mi" n "plan to intro other ppl in as well, if i joined".

well, i can oni say, for insurance, i knw y i going in. for MLM, it's basically merely a partime job which dun really atract mi.

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Location: office
taking some time to blog lah. dun care if network admin find out anot.

i finally made my first move to contct the agent who ask mi join her. luckily,my role here cannt access data of clients, if not i bang my head. she told mi some news. now i pretty keen. although i not prepared to take any more exams, but i not surprised tat i need to take 1 if i really go into it. dates have been set. wif my tech knowledge, n my POV, i hope to make it big. haha...

den hor, yesteryda, wah liao, pretty fed up. heard over lunch tat, my job agency really cheat us contract workers lotsa cold hard cash!!! i earning oni meagre sum. den when i hear ppl from other depts earning 2-** times more than mi, wah i really dui. i really dunno th diff btwn our caps. maybe i really lack confidence, or lack the knowledge and foresight to do future planning. i jus tke things as it goes.. but now, wif the direction of IT, i begin to really check my route.

IT helpdesk is not a job for long term. i mean firt level. if it's inhse program, ok, u can stay there n advance within. but u need more certs to go further. now i got java, which ithink iwill make use... try to at least. den insurance.... well, it's a plan of mine, cos i still need to check if... i still need to adjust my mentality. i now getting better lah. getting more to be myself, getting funnier n relaxed.

funny,. the more i tink of it, the more i find it true of myself. u know, if i totally no interest in sokething, no amount of persuading or hard selling can soften mi. but if i find it to be worthwhile, i will really go into it. cos.. think of insur n MLM. my frn wanna mi go MLM, i si beh not keen. now, i calling up the agent, to find the route to being adviser, they got seminar next wk. i know i'll go, n my aim is to really find out details of it, n watever. perhaps it';s my stubbornness?

but hor, haha... ytday, i almost wanna come out to a cranky jnr colleaue siazz. but no gd chance. den this morning, or whole day... i bene doing not much. the new cso guy he's wokring n learning mor ethings. while i just si back n relax haha. well, i shan;t b bothered. cos i dun intend to stay long. i'm doing my job. i dun intend to learn 2 much.

e oni grumble is tat, whenever it comes to pssing instructions to mi, they tend to really take mi as a blur king n tell mi this tat, wat to do, how to do. n hor, when i wanna try out helping them fix compuer problem, they bochap n say "nvm lqh".

i oso wonder if lies n unhappiness is everywhere siazz.. just now i helping user do someting. e jnr suggested changing the language of the system. i find it odd, cos it's not the root, but she insiste. ok loh. i jus try. cos now, i dun see the pt in enforcing my idea, will just try wat she wan.

the funny part is, she say the user qujite ok 1, just explain to him the issue, etc he is ok 1. den later, i was trying to see if i can fidn the cause of the problem, she came over n say "wat u doing? if u dun call him back, n play around wif the system, later he unhappy n complain."

hahah, i find it funy. cos she herself can tke the time to find the cause of a [rpblem, but when the prob cant b solved, i try to see wat i can do, she tell mi dun play around. but she did mention the person is nice to tok to, but later tell mi he may complain if it take 2 long?

oh, n den just now as i doing some tests for my job, wah, liao i really lose interest sizz.z.. find it so repetitive n nvr endin. somehow i feel tat here, the ppl aren;'t really tat smart enuff to climb up the corporate ladder. cos, both keep complaining abt the life. i feel diff form them, cos i actually see thru wat;s going on lah. liek they grumble y the person like tis, tat, den i jus keep quiet, cos i knw wat happened.

i oso have the impression tat moving aroundlife suit mi more, cos i;m someone who dun like to move around, unless it;s needed, or i'm tempted to. so if my job jus need mi to stay at my desk, i will just stay n dun move around. but if i moving all day i either get tired, or i enjoy, cos i;m enjoyingthe scnerary. n have the chance to work, as i tour singapore

cute fashion guy

adam enjoying massages... haha, the producer trying some tricks siazz... ask adam to intro the win while in bathrobe. n even put 1 legs up siazz..

adam in casual wear...

adam intro fashion wear!

haha, sometimes i fidn it strange. when u hate or dislike something, u tend to put a link to the page that you had such feelings for. but then, if u realyl dun like it, why bother put up the link? it'll jus generate interest. u know, bad publicity is better than no publicity. if u say soemthing is bad, n give a link, ppl usually visit it to check out wat's wrong. it'll generate interest. esp when u feel it dun really have the content to call for such attention.

umm... skip the sad side a while.

ahah, i swam today, den hor, i was actually attracted to a hubby, who's guiding his toddler boy how to swim. cos the boy was using a float, n wearing tights, i somehow, at first, thot tat the hubby was an instructor. den gradually, realise it's dad-son. dad wearing those metallic finish goggles. clean face. got slight tummy, but tone body. haha, my eyes r usually on him siazz... till he left the pool for the slide, n sauna.

den quite surprisingly, today... ya it's sch holiday. den got a group of 6 sec sch BOYS playing water. some wearing bermuda kinda pants. they having fun in the pool. but den, kauzz, 1 guy was abt 10 cm from his group, i was swimming to wards this guy, den i really dunno if i shld swim which way siazz, cos skali i swim, den he move again. den i said "sorry" firmly to him. he stunned n moved. haha, funni part is, his kinda "beng" frn den swam up to mi, to see my face. i bochap them totally.

however, later on, maybe i 2 sensitive, they keeping getting at my way. but well, they r having fun together, so i can oni swim away. i got a feeling, if i tell them off again, they will fight back.

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these days, i really wonder.. wat's the diff % frn n lover? both shld b similar in many ways. but latter can offer sex, understanding, support? somehow, for most of my relns, they seem to leave once they not happy or find someone better. for mi, i'm pretty persistent. not willing to give up without a fight. perhaps 'cos i believe in communications.

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*GOSH, I WAS POSTING YTDAY, DEN SUDDENLY BLOGSPOT SEEM TO HAVE SERVER PROBLEM. ALL MY UPDATES R GONE FROM TIS POINT ON!!*

shall write wat i rmb:

commercial awards presentation. a singer jus came out wif a new album, n entered into the competition as well. n hor SYZ tis time, she seem to act cute wif her voice. is she imitating jolin?

i'm quite used to telling the truth. but at times, when things dun appear as simple as it seems to b, i try to tell truth, but end up ppl misjudge mi n think of mi badly. like, when i have my reasons for doing something, den when tell them the truth, they think i dun value them. got 1 time, got 3 groups of frns ask mi out for NY coutndown. 2 groups cancel last min, den i go for the 3rd group. i told 1 guy the truth, den he was like taken aback by my rsponse...

so now, i'll judge who r the ones i can tell teh truth... but i think, i'll b frank wif all i know... unless i fidn they r lying to mi...

lastly, i put up links to various interpretations of my zodiac sign. somehow, now i blif in the readings of the zodiac sign liao... cos it really tell abt mi internal feelings n thots. i was suppressing myself a lot... haha, due to various reasons...

ahha, although i'm not 1 of those VELI popular blogs in the world, i'm pretty glad i have some faithful readers. although i dunno who u r... (ahah, n even wondering if i shld thx u cos u r reading my private life details, or shld u thx mi instead for sharing my life wif u haha) but i still glad u keep on reading :)

i think it's time to really give myself a break. i just realised today, i suddenly got 3.5 days leave remaining. thot was oni 1 or 1.5 oni. intend to, for this xmas, go Oz find my pals.to seek solace n to enjoy time wif them, n cheer up them n boost their morales!!! i VERY great hor ?! =D

den, as i plan to open up diff accts in various banks to facilitate fund transfer, i check ocbc/posb etc. kauzz... ocbc hor, it says minimum is $1 mthly balance. den it say mthly balance muz b 500$ if dun wan kena 2$ admin charge?? wah liao...

sometimes, i post pictures of interest to my blog. these usually generate HIGH traffice to my site. haha, am i using it to promote traffic? dunno.. m i unscrupulous? ahhah...

den sigh... 2 groups of frns... 1 is poly 1 is sec. sec frns now become closer to mi. den poly frns... last yr, or some time, i toked tat a frn was getting mi into MLM. ppl den started to dissuade mi. well, in end, i din join cos no $$. but i was keen for 1-2 mths. den when i decided to quit, tat frn din contact mi anymore. n.. for mths (starting from the time i take up java course) till now, they din cotnact mi for outing at all. i checked with the person who usually org such outings, n he's the 1 who intro mi to MLM. gues wat? he say they still go out once in a while.

huh? go out den din ask mi along? nvm, i shan't make a fuss. oni when i'm wif the group n someone ask, den i speak the truth loh. he say they going tree top this sat, den he say will lemme know details of the outing by today. so i ask a close frn of mine in the group. she say she know nothign cos she not informed. huh? n den today, the outign is cancelled................................ dun ask mi y...

when i was celebrating my 21st bday, i came out to those frns who came to the party. my gal pal, noted tat, the poly ppl, din ask mi to join in their game. jus den, a street wise poly frn ask mi join in. dunno.. they seem quite ok abt mi in the past.

right now, wat i need to do is to get back my lifestyle. it means to realising myself better n living it according to its likes n dislikes. cos, it seem like i'm more suited to a lone living style. this yr is more of a realisation yr for mi. when i realise wat's the real direction for mi to strive harder.

i know i'm bad at PR, so i reading boks. n i will b callign frns up to meet n go out. i posted links to my chn zodiac sign, monkey. these 2 mths, i begin to really enjoy myself n b noisy. till now... at this point, i kinda find it boring to stay home at times. i guess frns r there for u to realise urself? haha... perhaps i'm learning to, no loonger b so quiet n begin to njoy life more?

but a lot of things r still in planning stage.

like.. plan to buy contact lens, chk monash payment modes, buy blue tooth head, buy digi cam. haha... digi cam n lens r most jialutz. cos each cost xxx $. siongzzz

Monkey Signs

Find your Fate

Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

DoubleSign

Lovegevity

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was at home having dinner... n sharing my sis' pictures. it seems that i've sacrificed much more than i thot i'd. the chemistry is gone with my family members. in order not to let them have a diff idea from mi, i wanna explain more, but realise tat they know wat i toking.

i begin to wonder if i'm really more suited to a life of solitude. kinda getting used to living on my own. yes, i'll still catch up wif frns though.

when ppl are living on their own, they tend to be the decision makers. so, they have to realise n find out wat is the better/best option for anything. in such case, they grow up to be more independent. n if we know wat's best for us, we may want things done our way. in such cases, will there be anyone who can accept us?

well, i do agree tat there can be clashes from tiem to time due to thinking n belief diff. but as long as there is comunication n mutual understanding, i guess it's alright? to keep a reln long, my tinking is tat, u shldn't assume tat the person knows wat u r thinking of, or able to adjust to ur needs just after 1 or 2 times of happening. if u feel tat u r not happy about soemthing, wat's better than voicing it out n letting ur thots b known?

there is no perfect person. everything proceeds smoothly if all partties give n take. keeping any feelings or thots within urself ain't going to help.

wat's more, I wonder y am i often the persistent party in reln? I was usually the one who get jilted. The person either found someone better, or felt our characters clash, or simply started to ignore mi. I wonder, why is there such low tolerance in LTR? when we are unhappy wif a frn, we can tell him about it. or avoid him whenever possible. but when it comes to LTR, do ppl look for auto-change in that person, or they will talk it out?

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ok, abt the debate on ch U. having lived out on my own, i begin to underatand the pains of parents. i'm not a parent yet, so i cant say much. but having passed the period of kid, i know its feelings, but dunno abt the thinking of kids these days.

yes kids now grow up faster n understand much more than we do during our time. i am surprised tat the lady (ex-colleague) look demure, but she can spout out those sexual lines n thot inducing sounds. she's 20.

being kids, we often cant think much. some kids develop EQ prety fast. so, when thigns happen, they dun jump to conclusions but calm down n figure out the next step. these r the ok kids. but kids prefer to play n run about. they duno much abt EQ. they jus do wat they wan n dun ever think a lot. in this sense, parents hav to play a part. rmb when u were a kid, did u think a lot abt hwo ur family feel if u do something? if yes, COOl, if not, why u think ur kids can?

put urself in the kids shoes. u been thru their experiences n ages. ok, soem kids r rebelllious, kind, scaredy, adventurous. it depends on how much u know them. dun assume every kid is the same. when u are at work ,can u 100% ensure ur colleagues have the same thinking as u?

some kids, they listen to parents. but there r ppl who need to experience it to learn a lesson. there's no point in stopping them. it's better to jus let them know, they can try, but know the consequences. kids have their own thinking, but parents have the experience. let them know of the outcome. talk to them calmly. if the forseen problem comes, jus tell them ur opinons, dun ever blast off at them.

the key issue, know ur kids well.

ahaha.. after watchign the show, i jus slept at my family there. next morn, woke up, felt like i at some chalet siazz..

haha, how shld i start off my blog?

ytday is wednesday. my sis say tat it's a bad wk, cos we working on alternate days. den i felt it's rEALLY jialut. den when i go to work, my mood was affected. perhaps oso due to events happening in my life. or jus, it's really bad wk.

i was still holding on to my mp3 player, n listening to it. den ppl on the bus were kinda staring at mi, when i began humming out the songs i was hearing. wel, soemtimes, it's hard to diff btwn ppl who stare at u cos u R ODD, cos u look DIFF, or cos u look GOOD. got home, n watch the myth. wah, long time din watch jackie movie liao. was bit not used to his preaching of rights that shld b done. well i think that is how his shows r loh. den hor, wah liao, some scenes r so illogical n FAKE! like the princess trapped in the burning carriage for so long??

den the princess was so loose tat she willingly gave her body to jackie? my sis did "complain" tat the indian (haha, speaking here, i know wat else i wana write) actress oni given a SMALL portion of screen time. but the korean was given lotsa exposure. well, the korean IS the rightful lead actress. but the show was filmed in india, so they certainly will wan some of their best ppl inside the show. so they put in their actress, indian dance, n myths inside. but the ger did have some SIMPLe fight scenes.

however, the funny thign i realise is, they got strip scene in his show. i never know indian nationals r so bold to strip siazz. esp the police part. the ger is escaping from police, den the police accidentally pulled off her scarf, revealing her bikinis. den the best one came when, they went up a chopping machine. the ppl were finding it HARD to move at all. den haah, they began removing their clothings 1 by 1. haha. i dun rmb such lines being usual in his other movies, other than he tryin to "ka you" wif the actresses.

when the captain of the police whole body was stuck onto the machine, i figured he will actually begin to strip. haha, next scene, he tore the front of his shirt apart, revealing the hair. then they began moving. the ger was stuck on the machine, wif her breasts stuck. jackie pulled her up but her bra was removed. he den, in a stunt, shifted his shirt onto her. den the captain appear topless. jackie was stuck on his butt. he den simply took off his pants oso. hahah, wah a humourous scene.

later on, at the end, they r at a mountain. strange, the professor can actually fight better than the warrior of the Qin dynasty. although at first, wif a sword, the warrior gained the upper hand when fighting jackie. even better, the warrior later was injured n fighting 3 guys, but he was "OUTNUMBERED". wow. n den the professor grabbed his hand. the warrior still has 2 legs n 1 hand, but is suddenly left helpless. hahaha.. n he was pushed away into the infinity. but jus b4 the shwo end, he appeared from nowhere, causing the death of the professor. LOL

wah watch the show till 1230am. din wan go home liao, cos wanna watch ch U debating show. will post comments abt it later, in next blog. slept at my family there.

next morning, watch "chang hen ge". BORINGshow. but first time to see sammi in an unscrupulous role. or perhaps jus scheming role. nothing to watch out for to mi, since DANIEL WU oni appear for 5 mins of show. SIANZ. luckily din watch in movies.

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i oso realised tat i MUZ brush up my toking skills once more. n dun assume ppl will understand my thots. for wed's lunch, i ask my colleague buy for mi, cos i dun wan go out. CC n BB went n brought back, the lunch cost 1$ more than expected. there is still some change tat i can take from them. CC passed mi the lunch n told mi it cost more. later on, BB returned mi th change. n i smilingly ask how come it's so little change. CC den explained 1 more time to mi. i know i'm jus teasing CC lah. but, soemhow i jus din explain myself...

den at home, over dinner, my sis bought KFC. i exclaimed "u oso buy ah?" when i meant "u still buy ah?"

somehow, i have a number of things to update, but off hand, i cant rmb all...

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not sure hwo to start off a subjct. well, in the past, if there is soemthign i haveto rmb, eg some words, some sequence, etc, i will usually PICTURE IT n rmb it. picture as in, i keep the whole image (or how the word looks like) and rmb it. den i can recall it easier, insteaqd of remembering by its pronunciation or spelling. but jus now, i was tring to rmb "bodhisattva", n was using its pronunciation. den i rmb, i shld b usign the "film" in my brain. ehhe, i managed to do it. even when i was in sec sch, there was a tv show, the ppl were told to rmb a sequence of numbers. (left 2, right 5, left 3, left 1, etc)

for ppl who have a GOOD memory, well, shld b no problem. but others, may rmb it by the left 2/3/4. but for mi, i pictured it in my brain, the position of the first number, 2nd 3rd. since it's a picture, i can rmb it. my mum oso ask how i did it.

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last night was showing the superstar ppl hosting. they got a sauna scene. wat i rmb, is such idols usually dun bare their skins so easily. the producer either changed it perception and the "idols" too, or they wanna save the viewership.

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during my 6 mths of working tis yr, i somehow was persistent in my idea n suggetions. den now, my exams over liao, i seem to have better control over my EQ n way of expressing myself.

den yesterday, when i go to work, i was using my mp3 player, n taking news paper. wah, i kinda look so cool siazz.. ahah, n for the first tiem, i was really mesmerised by the songs i was listening, tat i was humming the songs to myself. hehe, i felt i kinda made some ppl turn their heads. but i was really.. turned on by the songs, i bochap :)

hehe, i rmb 1 mth back, got a caucasian said in a forum tat he was listening to his fast paced songs n dancing to himself, the passers-by all stared at him in disbelief haha.

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ahha, jus checked on the "map". for france/paris ahah, so paiseh siazzz

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somehow, these days i seem to get premonitions... eye twitches... dunno how true is tat...

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"this is not a very friendly response!" - u mean the monash modules? ehhe, paiseh paiseh.. but haah, it did help in making our grad time sama sama rite?? hahaha...

"Stay away from my HR turf!" - hehe, It support is not an area to be survived on. i got java basic to fall back on. my dip is too outdated liao. see first.

--- i am an introvert all along. i tried to make myself outgoing but it's VELI tiring. i mena, i can be spontaneous n be chatty wif newly made frns. but over time, it'll die down, cos it's really tiring. job ads often ask if candidates ca b team player. i thot i can. cos as long there is communications within the team, it shld b alright to work as a team.

but now, i have doubts on myself abt tat. can i really work as a team member? my job now centres on picking up phones and answering queries. many times, when i'm at my pc, i feel lazy to walk around n chat wif ppl. i am just stuck on my chair. unless my inquisitive side gets mi, i wun go up and tok much. wld prefer to stay quiet n b ready to pick calls.

i begin to feel tat i need to work alone, wif myself working hard to control the direction of my future. ie, a stable n low income is not my vision. wld prefer a career whcih i can take charge of its happening. well, perhaps my prog self is coming back, in the marketing n sales line.

i do prefer making new frns n moving around. although this can b tiring at times.

my self esteem is low, as wat i gathered from a social cognition book. as a person who acts independently (hey, i resolve my own problems as best as i can n take care of myself), i have high esteem on tat. but wif a group, i usually no idea who to join. 'cos wif a group, i dun relaly know who i can tok to. and whether tat person will wanna tok to mi anot. unless tat person has formed strong bonds wif mi?

usualy, i prefer to tok to gers. cos, they r the frnlier kind? n we can oso tok abt guys if the need arises. but now, another reason came up to mi: if i tok to guys, i tend to judge them wif their appearances. if it's nice looking, i will try to tok more to acquaint wif him. if not, i may try to tok at times.---

"YOu actually went to an exams unprepared?" - ye, u saw it rite. well, i totally lost hope in preparing for it. not say din read anythign. u know, i was reading the first LT notes, den saw it's merely points n need to refer back to txtbk to read details. den at the txtbk, i din bother to find out which chap/sect/para the notes were discussing, n stated from the basic chap of the bk. i found joy (wah, sound veli xtian hor?) in reading tat part. i realise my foundation is kinda really gone. i was re-picking up my HW knowledge. wat's more, 2 days to help mi finish 11-12 stacks of LT notes, each wif 30-50 pages. n not forgetting i nedd to touch on the asgt, n past exams to brush my skills up. all these, i dun BLIF i can finish in 2 dayss.

this is not "having no conf" but knowing ur limits n not pushing urself too hard when u know u really cant mee the deadline. but i still read watever i can, in the book. wif the knowledge i have, i went for the exam wif a light heart. i still managed to ans soem qns ok lah. i did not return a blank page.

"It now works, and you're syndicagted again" haha, nice to hear tat. i think it's really due to the language settings on my blog :) do keep ourselves in contact with each other!!

" Hey luvktv, you have a great blog here" was posted to a blog dated in february. pretty surprised, but nothignt o say.

haha, the producer of the show VELI determined not to expose certain body parts of the guy siazz...

actually.. why are humans considered as the superior being? jus now, Tv got reports many crows died. den got 1 scene. a bird lying on the roadside. another bird was trying to perch on it and pick it up. but 2 heavy n failed. it's saddening to see such a scene.

once again, the lead actor has a topless scene. haha, is this the std of shows? commercial shows?

oh well,.. cuties oon my "camera" again =D

wah, the finalists of the super star show so lucky... most every wk got a stage for them to sing. ahha, aka holding a solo concert siazz.. cos got aud, no judge. wif the botak hairdo, he look tuffer n leaner...

stephen n nicholas... wat else do i have to say? well, ste is tied up tho... the tattered shirt looks rugged...

the lead of ong bak show.. helping in charity. he can look both charming (top left pic), n serious n in deep thots. but his acting is 2nd'ary. his fighting skills is still main draw. tat y his firs tshow, jus focus on his fighting. n like asia's jackie chan, he's a knack for fighting. haha, ok, the main pic i took, is jus on time for the sexy scene.

rr... the supposedly first pic of the cute yandao... maybe i forgot to post it ytday

the guy in black has a stunningly cute smile.