7:16 p.m.

gosh... cant imagine my exam is jus round the corner!!!

will i pass? this has been on my mind for wks..

for tat guy i met in badminton, i guess better if we remain frns... cos called him in morning, den he busy, but say call back at 10am, no call... guess no intrest. well remain as frns den..

for my exams, i've planned.. hope it works.. i'll finish my computer organisation notes (the lecture tat cause me headaches) by today.. or nite.. by tuesday anytime, i muz finished revising multimedia module. den rest of the time, spent on understanding n gripping better on the subj.. sianzz siaozz... can i make it? haha.. wif the influence.. or rather lure, of porn, i really have to be determined liaozz... haha.. n jus JO in office again!! LOL.. this time, watched 3-4 porn movies ina row.. haha...

1 couple of them really damn good...

12:17 a.m.

got a few thigns wanna say.. but no time to write at all..

went for badminton again. a guy who i had a crush on is there today.. n i saw my ex-look-alike.. end up keep staring at him..

tat crush.. later tok to mi.. den chatted happily, n exchange numbers. next day, i msg him.. n passe a few smses...

den.. my office got 3 new ppl... 1 guy is ... the front looks quite plump.. den (long story cut short) today he there in Tshirt. wah, his 3D fig look so huge.. perhaps not plump, but VERY BIG size... width breath height.. small head wif big body... chatted wif him.. wanna take snaps of him, but too bad, he went of liao.

11:25 p.m.

wah, i kisiao liaozz.. thot will be jus another day of travelling... but din expect to be so tiring!!

i boutt o sleep liao.. waitin for a video to finish, so i'll jus write the best part of the day :)

long time din go badminton... today decided to go again. but was late.. n really took trobule to prep... wear proper clothes for outing, n bring extra clothes for game.. wah,,, HEAVY bag..

got there.. n watched ppl play.. cos dunno if can find ppl who match my skills... den, oso saw someone who look like my ex... wah.. in end, i kept loking at him uncontrollably siazz...

den.. hor i reaslied got 1 guy who i had told him.. i rmb seeing him on ch U star search... he was there oso... n toked to mi.. but i.. long tiem din go badminton, so forgot most ppl.. oni rmb his face, but nothign else.

so, when he tok to mi.. i try not to b excited, but normal mood.. :) clever rigth? LOL

den we went for meal as a group, n we sat beside each other... later we actualyl realised we living in same area siazz..

on the train, we tok cock n i even told him "I managed to molest u" LOL.. is it obvious? i guess it's... well, i wanted tat hehe..

really tok cock, den i oso exchange numberds... he even say, in future can go for supper together... :) haha.. of cos, my mind is.. to... see meet him on bed! our minds somehow can click leh

10:27 p.m.

i finally gonna finish my assignment.. now gonna save in pc n submit work... den.. iron tmr work attire... sianzz...

11:47 p.m.

the songs that sounded best n good years back.. in 90s.. now become everlasting love songs kind,.,.. i begin to feel old liaozz... wait 5 or 10 yrs later, antoher of amei (WAT?????????) sammi bla bla everlasting best pop hits come out... GOSH..........

9:09 p.m.

went to library to do my assignment. hehe.. managed to finish 2 qns.. is library env really so good and conducive?

alright, was 2 stressed den, took naps from time to time. ahah.. seem like fantasies get wilder in dreams.. tat why fantasy?

won bin (yuan bin) new movie coming up.. den hor, i actually thot of... he kena caught, den as POW, he was tied.. or rather chained up... first image was of him chained in trousers.. but why not brief oni? den he was trapped in brief oni..

den imagine him was chained facingthe ground.. ppl wanna rescue him, but he shouted at them to scram :) den i thot.. as POW, he will ejacuate almost everyday.. den his sperm... shld fall on ground, or his body??

on ground more obvious... but... on body, can clean up his body :D

so he's tied up, or chained up.. facing ceiling.. but somehow imagine his face facing ground.. dunno why..

sometimes pull out his pte to play with... hahahahah...

10:03 p.m.

oh hehe.. tis noon, stayed home n saw tV... wah.. haha.. on 1 variety show, 1 male contestant was intro'ing his house. he got a younger bro. but he himself is damn attractive liao. 10 times better than bro.!! wif his accessories, my hunch is tat, he's GAY.

n hior, dunno if his deco is really appreciated, or his personal appearance's appeal, his vote is the highest! haha... if such guy ever invite mi to his house, haha.. even if i rushing for work, or doing something DAMN urgent (excluding life threatening 1s), i WILL AGREE 100%%

9:47 p.m.

i knew it... once again, my sec sch best frn has disappointed me. asking me to go his house few days back, den last min call to say he going doc cos he having muscle pain.

how come he got the pain?

he dunno.. he was giving tuition, sitting there, suddenly felt the pain. told mi 3 hrs before i left for his house. said will call mi back.

in fact, b4 i picked the call, i was prepared tat he'll suddenly say he cant make it.. due to SOME reason. tis time is more original loh..

but, pain n revising my work r 2 diff thigns. dun concern each other at all. so i went on to his house. io din see him at all. so called him a few times. 5.57pm, 605pm, 614pm, 625pm n lastly 640. when called at 640, i was prepared to give up. but his sis took call n said he resting.

told her he invited mi over to discuss work. she asked him, n he said he not feeling well.

alright, i've had enough! she said will get him to call mi back. nay, no need. i had wnated to say "u can tell him i will not call him again". but hehe.. "he no need to call back" came out instead.

anyway, since he so power, i shan't pick his call anymore. shall wait his sms. if he gimme miss call, i won't call back oso.

by now, he shld have woken up. if he true frn, he WILL call mi to tok n explain. if not, i'm prepared to give him up and end our frnship. enough IS enough.

11:57 a.m.

haaha.. jus realised tat, i din on my icq after the overnet managed to work.. :)

12:25 a.m.

sighz, useless mi.. jus did 1 part of qn 1 n e rest all have problem..

n jus now was trying restart my overnet.. somehow cant at all.. even reinstaling and bla bla, oso no use... last resort is download again. heeh. finally worked...

8:46 p.m.

another thing to add...

why muz parents of KIDS always make their children cry?? cant they explain to them.. reason wif them? everything in thsi world is about reasoning. they shld teach them to reason mah..

when tell them, something cannot be done, why not explain the reason? rather than say "be good, listen to mi". or even shout to scare them.. why?

umm.. shall i add this paart to my hpg?

8:42 p.m.

strange...

seem like now, i got a pc.. n outta exasperation, i will updatwe as i can to expres my... unhappiness over certain things..

i got problem wif assignment, so, called my BEST frn from sec sch. he was ok tat i go over his house to ask him asgt thigns. but when i asked if i can stay even if no 1 in his house, he dun get my meaning. when insist, he decline. when try again, he say

"it will not be good if something is lost while you here". liaozz...

this line is so degtrading n untrusting. this line has left a bad impression on mi liao... but i need hishelp ,so... i cant tok back..

5:45 p.m.

hip hip hooray!!! had a hard time fighting an assignment qn!!! finally found a way to solve it!!! YEAH!!!

12:34 a.m.

last night drank kopi to keep myself awake in order to do assignment.. true enuff,, after drink kopi, not sleepy liaoz :)

den in morning, suddenly... dun feel like waking up n doing other assignment.

but in class today, coincidently, although i late.. but i actually got there same time ase tat yandao guy!! haha.. i saw him looking at the monitor for rm no, waved to him n walked to the room wif him.. hehe.. cos seats mostly taken up, WE sat at the rear..

wah, can say i was rather happy.. even, in a frnly way, touched his arm, face. is this touchy>?? lol.. chatted wif him oso haha.. too bad tat David is gone......................

12:47 a.m.

sighzz.. wonder if due to last wk n first day back to morning shift's performance... or may i sensitive?? my team leader and asst team lead kinda harsh today...

ask team lead to write email to request for extension of asgt deadline, he refuse.. but my taxi claim is back.. but hoping to fight for more $$ :D

after fighting, i'll ask for OT claim!!

9:11 p.m.

jus wnana update my blog.. in case later forget...

wahhaha... 1 night at work, i went on irc.. den someone... ya someone posted on main to ask who into bondage bla bla etc stuff. den i replied.. n we started off chatting abt tat n discussing wat gonna happen. but cos i at work.. i thnk i wrote it in my diary tat time oso..

cos i at work, response slow.. den he suddenly went off. this morning (2+am), he was online n he using some odd nick again. saw mi n asked if i was the one he chatted with.

so we chatted more.. he said he kena d/c tat night.. n we chat chat.. n tok abt kinky stuff oso... he pretty new... so he kept praising himself.. perhaps to make ppl into him... n din realyl care who is chatting wif him..

but since anything may go wrong after meeting, i told him to give some codes if he dun like my image loh... if not, we will proceed with our plan!! haha..

n hor, first time, i slept from 12+-9pm. den awake all teh way til 6+7. din wan rest, but... cant resist.

heard tat huang shiyu hosting kids show at 9am, i switch on tv, but cant find him.. n kinda dozed off.. but i think he apepared every now n then :)

3:03 a.m.

ummm

1:58 a.m.

supposed to meet a cck person for mc bfast at mc, but he at last dun wan come out.. but jus wan to eat. form his pic, he looks quite good. and looked next door boy. but when meet, liaozz.. pimple face again. n passive. in end, din do anything as well.

BUT!!! when i on way back hom after tat, i bring my dog down for walk. hehe.. i saw tat boy who ask mi buy cigar for him :)

din recognise him at first.. saw 2 boys crossing road. none seem good. den they sat at busstop wait bus. den my dog was around tat stop. i noticed that 1 guy is looking at my dog.. i looked up twice n smiled at him at 2nd glance. he saw it, den waved at me.. awkwardly of cos.. haha.. den i realised he's e one who asked mi buy cigar!! which mean no interest in him lah hehe..

den slept... n woke 3 hrs later to catch Beautiful boxer!! i thot they lead actor is a macho n boxer guy.. but, seem like he turn out to be the iron ladies lead actor??? but not bad lah, his body.. big size n well built.. ;)

aiyozz.. cna i pull thru 2nite?

6:26 a.m.

seem like now, i update my diary every 2 days huh?

still stressed by asgt. havent even start yet.

arranged to watch movie wif frn. decided at 745pm. thot he can make it. turn out he last min got things to do. but hor, even if so, .. i mean in end, he arrived 30 mins late.. kauzz.. missed at least 15 mins show. why he cant simply ask mi not to buy the tickets yet.. or go for later timing? so sians to see 30 mins gone..

den later, when show ended, we went to take bus... oh haha.. b4 tat@@!!! i took train to the cinema mah.. den on the train, i saw a guy!! somehow i REALLU have the impression i saw him somewhere... not simply cos he nice loking.. i looked and looke.. but still no idea why i find him famliar... den he lighted train...

ok.. den when show ended, went to take bus. hehe my frn i think wanna send mi off.. but i dinno, so i waved him bye. cos as i walked to my direction whcih he not taking, he almost wanna follow mi, but at tat line, he retreated n went off hehe..

aiya, first time taek bus from there to work.. hehe luckily din late.. wat's more, my hp FLAT!!

someone... from the internet contacted mi.. but he not those kind who can talk.. den called mi, but duno wat to say, end up veli silent.. i oso duno wat to say.. cos maybe dun click loh..

hehe.. 2 days back, i finally had a hair cut again!! haha.. thot i dun need dye hair liao, but liaozz.. choose armani den realise hair still got gray color.

but tis time at the hair salon, veli funny siazz.. cos i bought some dry snacks from clementi, n will bring them to work.. so after hair cut will go work, den i bring to salon. den at salon, the ger who wash my hair everytime 1, saw it n was damn excited siazz!! but keep describing how she cna go and find the stall, but she cant get it. n later, she told her collegues, end up they all want to buy... wah, next time i buy, 8 strawberry, 8 choc flavour!! wah liaozz.. i become reseller liaioz.. n even joked siazz hehe..

anyway, outta pitiance, i did tell her abt my impression of her.. being naive perhps.. n asked her to be more careful.. anyway at her age, she still... veli young...

n last night, or afternoon.. received a msg form a JO kaki.. he wanna come.. i was quite reluctant lah.. but in end, i got horny n asked him come loh..

when he came, i had wanna do something to him oso.. but kauzz.. i thotfamily wil no 1 at home.. later my bro came home!!!! wah, scared stiff.. n immediately shut the door ah.. hehe.. when we finally done, den i realise i din bring my clothes into the room.. haha.. luckily got clothes in the room n i wore it.. if not, damn chamzz. nothing to wear, oni underwear n towel. haha..

oh, JO'ed rather far..

den hor, someone from fridae email mi to ask which guy in fridae pic is mi. he gave his icq so i add him in. but his needed autho. so i told him to autho mi first n i answer him. liaozz.. he den gave temper by replying, "i jus wanna know which guy is u. can't u jus tell mi??" wah laio, this kinda attitude, i immediately replied to check his attitude and tat i dun owe him an answer!

den he hehe.. blocked me from replying him.. LOL

anyway, maybe bored or something, i logged into IRC... hehe.. am surprised siazz.. suddenly got ppl ask if i the luv_ktv in fridae haha.. haa.. feel so strange but honoured n frightened in there..

got 2 ppl chat wif mi.. ok,i was asking for ppl to have mc bfast wif mi.. 1 guy den looking for ppl wif bdsm interest. i replied n everything was fine.. until he was kinda impatient.. we were almost ready to settle liao.. but cos i at work, my respoinse is not tat fast. den when i checking some impt stuff, he impatient n logged off.. sighzz..

he was into overpowering.. n have sleeping pill, tranquilizer, and mucle relaxant siazz!! tat sounds kinky for sure.. :D he keep saying he's boyish, cute, nice abs n chest haha..

finally, 1 guy inside msg mi to go bfast hehe.. exchanged pic... he not bad loking. den he kinda appolgise for something, den i teased him, he can apologise by going my house, or treating mi mc.. haha.. he wanna go my house LOL...

4:47 a.m.

wah hehe.. last night, i suddenly JO in office!! maybe bit tired... n jus for the sake of JO, so oni veli little leizz..

den, wore back my shirt.. left office early.. got home, bathed, and decided to go again hehe.. den this time, i can feel that it really wanna shoot far.. but 2 bad, my towel blockin the way, so oni 1 stream went far.. the rest was blocked n stopped a short distance oni.. haha.. but shiok still :)

i guess.. after i get my taxi claim, i'll question the HR abt my pay.. hehe.. in case, they angry den dun give :)

siao,,, my asgt left < 2 wks but still not starting at all... got a feeling tat i gonna fail siazz.. cos.. the tougher subject, i have no idea how to start at all siazz!!

today was kidna late for my class.. but hehe.. GOOD!!! cos when i got there, 2 frns sat liao, den no space for mi.. saw tat nice loking chap sitting alone at a 3-seater.. TOOK CHANCE TO SIT WITH HIM IMMEIDATELY!!!!!!!

toked a little at first.. den go into more topics haha... damn, he's a system analyst... kauzz... den i got his name n hp, but he din ask for mine.. nvm.. but i think he did have some idea of my orientation though :) cos everytime i'll peep at him :P

den this time, last time i went to class, i had MISTAKEN a guy for tat guy above.. n got to know him loh.. den i forgot his name liao, n din tok to him, but he initiated chat wif mi.. freom his response and eye contact, i guess he's.. kinda aj oso.. hehe.. not sure lah.. mi still novice :)

oh ya, on my way to class on the bus, got a young guy.. those slim jc/student type.. board the bus.. he sat nex to mi. he sat in such way tat when my arm moved, will touch him. den he din budge or shift at all... hehe.. confirm he aj.. but he.. act up high loh..

5:29 a.m.

hehe.. first time in office.. during 12am-8am shift.. i took off my top, n jus wear jacket.. hehe.. kinky.. but towards end of shift den did it.. ok loh.. nice feel n quite exciting.. but dun wan kena caught on secure cam..

den now, tis time, i changed much earlier hehe.. abt 5-6 hrs i in jacket oni... n guesss later gonna JO in office :) anyway, 2 long din liao.. LOL

12:12 a.m.

friday.. duno y, i felt alright, but dun wish to do anything at all or say anything. guess i was 2 tired, so went to bed EARLY.

slept at 9+. den woke at 1+. thot it's morning timing. den look at and saw it's jus 1.18am.. am i tired after all? well, i kinda did fall sleep in minutes after lying down. while later, i got up bed n decided to read abt those study loan pamphlets i gotten back.

felt rather insane though.. next day i working 12hr shift.. night shift some more n yet i still walking abt at 1+am

readin readin reading, unless my app din go thru, if not i really damn determined to go overseas study. thot of selling of my newly bought printer (not gonna use it n not been using it anyway) and oso sell off my bought-some-time-back shoes. din wear cos frns say tat's for tall ppl.. ARGHz. i need as much money i can save as possible...

n oso need to find guarantor... bank wif the best plan for my study loan, claim for my unpaid allowances.

thinking for 1 hr, i went off to bed, remembering wat i shld be doing in days to come.

so, off i went wif my aunt to take pic.. along the way, she told mi my previous car accident may allow mi to claim 1k+.. if true, den my phone bills alright liao!! LOL..

these days, i been feeling rather low.. dunno if it's cos i know i need to control my spendings to save money for my studies.. so cut down lotsa on entertainment... wanna watch 4 shows.. troy, van helsing, beau boxer, HELP, but guess can oni watch 1, and the rest buy vcds

saw my ex-date profile saying his current status if "prefer not to say". previously is monogamous. does tat imply anything? i actually both happy andsad. happy cos tat reln dun last. sad cos after all, it's emotions.

am i despicable??

den saw ex bf photos... 1 pic got extra guy!!! OH.... sad and happy again. sad cos he left mi (long time back) n now wif someone else. happy cos he is dating :)

3:17 p.m.

ytday finally decided to go MOM there to check out if i underpaid.. yes i'm :).. i'll check with my HR side if they willing to pay for the OT.. if not... :)

5:52 a.m.

actually i was prepared to knock off early.. but somehoiw... or as a habit, i tend to stay till got ppl enuff for the day.. was so tired.. rested on the train while going frn place..

at my frn place, well he was my date. i was kinda tired.. den ask to rest on his bed. i know he dun dare b funny wif mi.. but i wearing those small size Ts. den as i lying on bed, i dozed off. but i actually hope he may.. or someone may.. alright, i was putting my hand in such way tat my hands were pressing down my shirt, to ensure no exposure of body.. but i was hoping ,someone may bring my hand to above my head.. den my waist will be revealed.. den begin enjoying ourselves... LOL...

n ya, he is good to mi lah.. he is fond of mi..

later gonna call MOM to check.. cos i think i am under paid..

7:23 a.m.

thot over it.. feel that this incident made mi mature n grow up as well..

this is first time the guy i like is so chatty wif mi.. i mean i really chatted n joked wif him.. relations may not last, but frnship shld.. right? maybe this is wat ppl mean by stay as frns better than relns? At least, as frns, will be more natural n no worry abt... parting.. he like the other guy? ok, fine wif mi.. all the best ot them..

6:03 p.m.

I thot it over. i will not go. although it sounds like i lost the battle, but no point going. i'll not inform them oso. if they do call, i'll tell them, i got thing to do, den unable to go, n forgot to inform them.

anyway, next wk, i work mornign wkend oso.

4:48 p.m.

i really hope i dun regret about deciding to skip the dinner.. if i force myself, i can go.. but why the need to force?

3:53 p.m.

suddenly, my mood took a DIVE.

ok.. the day has all along been fine and happy for mi.. until jus now. now stuck at how to start my diary oso. damn.

ok.. on fri, thigns have been going on fine.. until nee... umm.. i KO from work, den go disco.. for first night... sianzz, no mood to write 2 much oso.

thinking thinking abt wat happened jus now.. really irritated mi. wonder if i'll still go for the dinner later...

ok.. slept pretty late after going to disco, or club, wif frn. saw 1 old acquaintance oso and saw some new ppl.. but guess i was 2 tired, so jus kept chatting wif tat frn. even when ppl try to greet or tok mi, i din bother to chat.

finally got home, and slept at 5am!!! (din feel like putting smiley at this mood). den next day, woke at almost 1 pm. recv calls n sms from colleagues. hehe.. i know e person on duty is tat cute colleague, but i jsu pretend :). den he identified himself.. n i tok to him abt what went on last night.. haah.. tok abt 30 mins i guess.. cos oso chated n gossiped :)

later i call another colleague... n den directed back to tat cute guy. so i called him again.. n spoke to him.. hehe.. i din expect our chat to be so long siazz... we chatted abt many many thigns... thigns i din expect to know from him and tok solong.. really so cool and happy... although mostly i asked the qns lah ehhe.. chatted for 1 hr 2 mins!!

den later, a frn asked mi go out, cos he meeting irc frn. but tat frn suddenly say bring a frn along ,so he ask mi along oso.. so i joined in.. n 1 was a pimple face, 1 is boyish face. boyish tat 1, no intereest, but look longer, feel better.

tried to tok to them, but can't. say 1 line, ppl join in n break our chat. even when i tok to him, he'll soon divert to others. no point toking.

1 last attempt was made when we down off to ground floor. my frn saw someone familiar n tok to him. so, i start to tok to them, but they kinda leave mi outta chat. so, wat i can do? jus move away n look at others thigns.

even later when the frn stop again, i steered clear from them n stood alone. y shld i join them, since they bochap my presence?

but then, this time, e person my frn met (wah, veli messy huh? so many ppl inside) has a frn along.. he looks quite proper.. not tat clean cut handsome type, but got the boyish man look. not bad. my eyes were on him since then.

i din expect us to stay for so long loh.. thot oni hi n bye oni. but later all of us went for drink. as usual, i strike chat, but evidently, tat guy "call him RIC?" had his eyes on my frn's boyish frn. cos i tok him Ric, he replied 1 liner. den when he tok to tat boyish, there was an exchange of lines. alright.

but along the way, we did have a frnly conversation. i oso asked for their nubmers. all gave. oni tat Ric din. he say somethign like he dun have hp... giving some reasons. n i thot his hp spoilt, so using other ppl's. den din bother much. really stayed for hrs siazz.. tok chat dance drink ate.

but i kinda know, tat boyish n mi, are almost fighting for him silently.. he is passive, so remain passive. i took initiative.

finally we decided to go ice-skating tmr. time is late noon. this wkend, i was rather happy though.. cos chatted wif cute colleague, n knew tat Ric.

got home n slept abt 5am+. till 3+, had been waiting for them to call n confirm ice-skating. finally someone called. but strange, why din Ric call? i had almost wnated to ask tat.. but my frn wanted mi to call him instead n tok.

so, 3 of us in conf call. i was looking forward to teh ice-skating thing. den somehow we chatted abt Ric.. n why he can't give us his number. so, e reason is, he was once somehow cheated of his nubmer, until it was passed to some strangers who called him. and it was during his exams.. tat disturbed him a lot. at this point, i told his frn, ask Ric to delete my number from his hp. Sicne he's not gonna contact mi wif his hp, why shld he keep my number? Since he's gonna contact me via his frn, why does he need my number? i dun understand his point. this is 1 thing tat irritated mi.

den, later the plan to go ice-skating was postponed to next wk. Reason is tat, e boyish cant make it this wk, so postponed. What???? 4 were going. becos 1 cant make it, it cancelled?? hey, we are not going on a date ok?! if you are gona date on the skating rink, go ahead. but if jus 1 guy u like not going and it cancelled, wat's the point??? we going there to skate, not to date! damn it! i refrain myself from using "F".

this is 2nd! 3rd 1

tat boyish is having family dinner. forgot wat time. so, they gonna, for his sake n ric's, have dinenr at that time. well did they ask if i free at tat time? NO. they decided based on tat boyish. and they just decided and decided to go wif it.

coem to think of it, i think i not going for dinner wif them lioa. although i like tat guy, i not despo to see him. PLUS, the skating cancelled due to dating reason, and his abnormal reason for not giving number. Period.