tis morning, woke up.. roomate nvr go work again... den i prepare my things... wah... drizzling!!!

n last day of STREATS.. now i know, e loss of papers, n tv channel add to the sadness for 2005, my frns gone.. all ya, e long hidden truth of mi being unable to go overseas study..

at work, haqha.. my close frn praised tat i look attractive today... wif the hairstyle, my ndp dressingh :)

luckily my mum got cook.. if not, really dunno where tyo eat.

hehe b4 KO, got call a new guy from irc... he 30+ n seem quite onzz for swim.. chatted wif him on phone cos sms oni 1 lines here n there

i think he pretty keen to tok wif ppl 20 odd yo.. den chatted things.. n i went home..

i planned to buy e cooling tea, n some buns.. finally decided tat will bring them for bfast tmr... den went home.. alright, i was SOOO... hungry n famished siazz.. cos like i said i bought KFC.. but tat took 10$.. den think i shld not spend too much.. so ytday lunch, i bought 3 mini nasi lemak, n a watermelon.. abt 1.8$ oni.. den.. later after KO, cannot tahan liaozz...

rushed family for dinner.. took quite an amt.. but avg for my own intakes :)...

hehe.. embarassing, but the water now is so COLD tat at home, i din bathe 2 dys liaozz.. all along been washing hair oni.. wah, so cold... den at family there, i took bath :) n washed hair,... finally... i thot :)

went home... n found some of my stuff kept liaozz.. but when i was moving my stuff aroyund, haha.. they dropped out.. hehe.. ok, rommmate did msg mi tat he clean up the place, but tat was when i reached family for dinner... he said "good evening... er" sounded so funny... LOL

den later i watched TV, and slept... while burning cds.. i think i finally got it... i mean hwo to edit with the new software...

den tonight, gonna fix aunt PC, and den go chiong... ready to party tonight... n even ready for some hot sex either wif a master (wink) or a regular sexmate..

at home, stayed home all the way.. n lived once again on my own.. dun ask abt where my rommmate has been.. i duno oso... all i know is that, i thnk he came back last night, took some things, den went out again.. i asked him if he's still working.. he say yes... den i ask if his shift in night, he dun say anythign... nvm.. jus have to ensure he pay mi the rent by the deadline, if not, i will be firm for sure.

den this morning, i went off for work as usual... woke up on tiem... den jerked off... within 5 minutes.. yes i know, cos i paused my alarm clock, den i took the time to jerk off.. den alarm rang again.. so i know it;s within 5 mins...

now, w/o any roommate around, once again, it feel like i living by myself.. prety nice :)

i kinda din feel anything for r/s liaozz... but this time, i wonder if i will oso kena the "not ready for r/s yet" mentality...

anyway, these days, when i see yandaoz or cuties, i dun have the urge to know them more or keen on them anymore. have i grown up? Or have i been affected negatively?

so ytday i got home... called my mum n know that she not cooking. so had to settle my dinner outside.. troubling over wat i shld eat for my dinner.. den thot of taking the god-forbid kfc.. still pretty nice.. but after so long never take.. i kinda not tat keen to take it liao.. although i still enjoy the taste of it :D

den went home.. n was prepared to watch charmed... kauz!!! it's not telecast!!!!!!!! the damn soccer show took over!!!!!!! arghzz.. den settled for other shows...

looking at the PC, i could have become almost doing nothing, but decided to edit my videos... wah lioazz... editing is pretty much a chore too.. cos... the software is freeware.. den really muz think n think n investigate which option is the one i need.. but hor.. kinda funny... anyway, i managed to crop the video still, but den, the turnout video is 1GB+?? when the original video is <1 GB??

i kinda cut the video into half... the video was < 1GB, but the result vide is 1GB+???? wha liaozz... n somemore, got different compression formats ... wah coolll./.. or rather, trobulesome :)

i really hope i din affect my colleague's decision...

she felt troubled n i tok to her... den i advised her from my POV... saying things like.. if she's not happy in a r/s, den why stay put there? a r/s is supposed to be happy, if it does not make her so, why stick on to it?

umm.. although my love life has not been smooth... am i in a position to tell her?

anyway, jus hope things are fine for her.. she pretty affected by past r/s tat she dun dare make a firm choice... thus, struggling with this...

strange... my msn is getting more n more contacts... i'm supposed to be more for icq.. but now, office ppl ,and new guys all use msn..

a long time ago knew liao frn.. or acquaintance.. ask mi out for dinner... when i first knew him couple a years back.. he was friendly to me... met at a wall climbing session... he brought mi there... but din tok much..

den this time, he ask mi for dinner.. n treated mi to it too.. and later we went to a bar which.. i did not know it exist haha.. inside there, got a fair skinned chinese-looking guy working... haha.. i asked for his name - Pas... or somehting like tat.. he is definitely not local.. more like filipino... cos his accent.. n he cant really speak the language well..

all he can do was to smile... haha... n while in the bar, i kept looking at him hehe..

n b4 we left, i patted his shoulder and waved goodbye to him.. smiling.. after i exited, i wnana go loo first... n ehhe there he is... coming out from the toilet.. n smiled again..

oh ya, when i first smiled at him, he was kinda startled and turned away his gaze while smiling...

after finishing toilet, i exited form bar again, n he there, picking the glasses... but i did look at him liaozz... hehe...

liaozz.. den on the bus, got a lady.. those young n vibrant type.. sit beside mi.. almost like wanna physical contact...

n this frn of mine, said i am diff from most ppl he met.. i am more down to earth while, others are rather arrogant and self centred...

monday.. wah liao, monday blues siazz.. no mood to work at all.. felt like takign some time off.. but damn.. jus went off for work again... n rommmate is stil sleeping...

at work, kena suan by a colleauge kauzz... den tok to a frn of mine for advice... haha,.. she damn busy n we met up for dinner... mum is cooking, so i dun wanna eat.. but later, still cant resist n took deer meat...

den later, suddenly she wnana go ktv.. hah. siao onzz.. den i oso go... haha.. long time no go ktv wif her liaozz.. quite refreshing n quite odd feeling.. not used to the way she behave... den sing till too excited.. dun wan go home for dinner... in end, spent 3 hrs at ktv.. hahaha... pretty fun...

den finally went back.. took dinner or rather supper first at home... but damn it.. wat is the home like now???

i was eating, den my mum told me there a letter for mi from lawyer.. look urgent, so they opened it. GOSH.. THAT'S MY LETTER!!!!

i really dun understand my family.............................................. what's the urgency here that they MUST open the letter without telling mi??????????????????????

somehow i rmb i did update some mroe things into my blog.. but strange, it did not show.

anyway, arrived at home abt 5+.. took supper... n chatted there... den got home to bathe... haha.. wore oni shorts n slept there.. slept 6+... woke 8, 9, 11, 12... finally woke up.. den they supposed ot be surfing net, but end up watchign videos siazz..

den they left.. n i surfing nt n using PC at home.. den hor, i was trying the video editng sofware.. quite good lah.. den oso trying out the various account types.. but DAMN!!!! i was trying the backup operator.. and sudenly the desktop customisation are all gone!!!!!1

wah liao!! wat happened?? den had to let rommate use the admin account... but dunno if he know it.. cos he still using guest...

den decided not to take anymore meals. n went off for gathering wif frns. ehhe.. i thto i was late.. but den, i wait for 10 mins, den got ppl come.. hehe...

during the meal, a sec frn passed a msg to mi from Oz... "GAYBOY"

haha.. had a fulfilling buffet steamboat... ate lotsa again... but then... i realised i din iron my shirts yet... wah liao.. den later, we suddenly wnana go movie.. watch kungfu.. haha.. rushed for the las train. n the show is pretty fun.. :) din realise tat i will get home so late siazz in the end, after ironing, i slept at 1+.. roommate almost sleeping..

umm.. jus uploaded my pictures.. taken with traditional cams... into the website..

at the chiong pt, tok n chatted..took beer oso.. quite a nice n colling place... but wah liao, always got tat 3) guy toking to mi, n thinking he oh-so-humorous...

took a light dinner.. n went for clubbing... went too early... there is no one at all...

went upstairs to rest... and chatted.. den soemone who i personally dislike... cos according to frn, he accused mi of something... he came up to our level, but i ignored him...

my frn supposed to join us, but too bad the queue was LLOOOOOOOOONG, so he went away. i wanna find him, but he dun wan.. asking mi to enjoy my time.. ok loh...

we wanna go down, but the place was jus 2 crowded... i was not even able to balance myself and i went off soon... rested n chatted more in tat place... den later, had fun teasing and toking... tat new guy kinda... fun loh,. still veli childish.. he say he used to walking fast, so i challenged him hqha.. he really rushed like mad isazz!!

den after the chionging, went for "debrief" and wah liao, tat 3) stil so touchy wif mi...

den we went our way home... the new guy had wanna take bus.. but later decided he 2 tired to take it n took cab instead.

den liao ... those ppl who going home wif mi... they take their own sweet time n took quick snacks.. den i keep pushing them to walk faster... cos i dun wan miss last bus.. but they still sighzz...

but we still managed to board a buss. haha.. n a frn was kinda cruised by a lesbian... a gay frn!! den all the way they were resting.. i was look n watching... got some bengs (who give mi feeling tat they are NSFs) they kep looking our direction.. ahha... nvm abt tat...

on xmas eve, i brought my gift for my date... took the time to wrap it up for him... even stayed back there to finish wrapping up...

den joined my frn for gathering at his frn's house..

cos my date is travelling overseas for xmas, i planned to surprise him by arriving at his place, when he jus came back from trip... den wah liao... thigns cock up... din manage to pass him the thing, i was frustrated, and almost din enjoy my xmas eve.. stayed very quiet and isolated, but abt 1 hr before xmas, i managed to pull myself together again.

to think i was so silent for 4 hours... from 7pm to 11pm. Frns have been trying to get me into the mood, but I simply lost it. Drank liquor to kill the mood. into the MN, a guy kinda... bathed n changed in front of us.. and later he told our fortune with his tarot card. i ask for it as well.

during this session, realised quite a bit about my future... n told him wat i was told in the past as well. kinda know what's gonna b my future. tarot seem more like telling u what;s gonna happen in near future, while facial n palm is more like rounded.

after the session, i kinda confided in him wat happened... n also expressed my interest to... know him personally...

den all of us went to sleep... and the next morning, went for bfast... strange though.. seem like i was not tat welcome.. cos...

cos everytime i had to think of topics and start the chat.. they seldom did. seldom involved mi in their talks as well.

so, just as we left the place, i decided not to tok anymore... unless they initiated it. and true enough, no 1 bothered abt mi. i walked right in front of them.. i mena a few metres away.

came home... n thot of having a good rest... cos the eve wasn't that great. but i din wanna join my good frn's party... due to some personal conflicts.

but when i got home, i simply can't rest... forgot wat i did, but i went to irc... i was honry... chatted there... n got someone keen to get over here.. someone was outside and wanna get ppl to join in for xmas... n someone who THINK HE IS HOT STUFF N PUT ON ATTITUDE.

1) tat someone keen to come over, he live near mi... he came over... n it's was not tat hot, but more to les than an avg enjoyable scene...

2) the guy outside, he was bored for xmasn wanna find ppl to go out.. ok loh.. can go out oso.. cos i dun wan stay home, n i dun wan call ppl out oso...

3) the attitude guy... i show him my picture, n gave my number, he called mi with private line.. i not free... den after hanging up, as a good gresture, i praised tat he sound sexy. den attitude came. he told mi tat to get his number, i have to give him a bigger picture...

i asked, why. he said "cos he is hot property". comeon, get a life! why shld i give him wat he want?? I gave him 2 items, he din even wanna give 1, and think he's hot?? wat's worse, he even threatened to post my number on the main window if i dun give him?? what' kinda guy is he???

i told him off... n posted his msg on the main widnow. den i told him there's no point if he's insincere. den he said, it's my loss. huh??? well, i'm not desperate.

after meeting 1) i went off to meet 2).

along the way, i called my good frn... haha.. do i wanna address him in this way?? dunno... n he's at home, watching TV. i asked him out... to join us... haah.. first time i called him so directly.. forgetting all unhappiness i had with him..

he's coming, den i called another person.. who's supposed to have lotsa time... hehe.. true, he is alone n spending xmas at home LOL.. asked him out loh.. den when i got there, the guy is there... and he got another person wif him.. haha.. tat other person oso from irc... umm.. i guess i continue writing.. no need to write another page..

chatted with 3) and new guy... 3) is actually .. somoene who i met before..

new guy.. not bad, can click wif him.. den... 3) supposed to meet a new person.. but thi person.. 20+ yo, jus show attitude.. he keep saying cant find us,... when finally saw us, he lost his temper and stormed. i saw him n shouted for him.. he pretended not to hear. oh well.

den 3) called him.. pissed, i screamed "jus now say got many entrances when there's oni 1! saw us and went off loh! shout for him oso din hear us loh.." simply pissed at him..

later 3) still called n met him.. well, for mi, i simply dun bother myself abt him... when 3) got him n intro us, i oso bochap him n take as transparent. then we all jus went off to enjoy our time...

had wnana watch show,. but no seats.. sighzz.. den all the way went to our chiong point :D

hehe.. realisd tat i din update my blog for quite some time... i oso dunno y... maybe dunnno wat to write...

actually, i did think may be troublesome to keep updating...

chey!! i checked my blog, i updated everyday!! but.. i guess i din update wat hppened in my life, more to my eelings n thots of the world/life/career....

anyway, tuesday, i toked to my roommate, n setteld some issues... but i wonder if i was 2 harsh in my words... i know i'm right to tok to him abt thigs, but do i have to b so stern? checking wif frns...

umm.. i jus checked the sun education centre, jobs site... my thoughts, career, interet n bla bla... i guess i really keen to go for it... but udno how long this field can last.. sianzz... i know if i gonna tak ejava, i shld go for java job..

but i wonder if i can make it... or still end up in helpdesk..............

umm... haha.. last night took soem tang yuan... but sad tat, my family now decided not to make but to buy from marts... sianzz... den wat the whole point?? such thigns, can get from mart anytime.

even reunion dinner oso can skip lioa... cos we have it almost every wk....

well, din really fee like saying wat happened past days...

anyway, hope someone can buy mi a portable fm tuner.. tuner is top priority.. other functions don't matter...

sunday night... i think i slept early... a frn called mi, but nothing much to tok...

den monday morning, woke up n suddenly dun feel like going for work. decided to take 1 day MC. n kinda planned for my day... will go irc chat for 1 hr, den go take MC, den call Sun java ot check on the course modules. den go swim.. n lastly, meet up my date.

in irc, pretty quiet..., so went to see doc.. wah, wait 1 hr to see siaz.. den went home, n brought my dog down for walk. den went off for my swim.. not so crowded this time. but hor, today got 1 old man cruising.. wha liaozz.. his way of cruising is so damn obvious loh!!

swim in triangular route, den pause a while to look at ppl. wha liao... i swam to other side of pool to avoid him.. den oso got ppl wif nice bod n skin tone lah :)

den after swim, i bought bread to take for my lunch.. kinda sick of those meals... so take bread better. took a bus there... wha liaozz, at this hr, can really see ppl from all walks of life siazz... the bus i took.. think go by the long way.. 45 min later arrive at my destination..

kauzz.. i jus done wiht my swiming, so i in veli veli casual dressing.. den when i entered the office building.. wah liao, i feel so "outstanding" cos oni mi in the type of attire siazz... den... hehe.. the staff there.. a mid age lady i guess,, thot i still in army!! i kinda flattered! LOL..

den when tat ended, i asked if my date can come look for mi, for pre-xmas... 2 bad, he NA. so i made my way back to home loh.. den on the bus, a guy... hah.. my gaydar is not workign... strangely, moved up to mi, until i can almost touch his pte...

den when i alighted, i went home directly for dinner.. n went home.. called a frn, but his hp never ans.. called another frn to arrange for xmas outing...

jus den, a so called ... i mean i had wanna take him as my good frn, but 2 bad he dun appreciate... he mass msg mi to join his frn's xmasparty... so insincere...

1) if it's his frn, why is he inviting mi?
2) if he know mi, why can't he invite directly?
3) n he's doing mass msg'ing.. alright loh... i shan't care abt him...

i think i gonna focus on my java studies. for now, ok, last week, i did get a job offer for onsite post. but till now, no reply.. if really so jialut, i gonna focus on my java, den get a helpdesk or programming job, for monash, i gonna defer it again... sianzz... i wonder if will come to a pt when i totally dun wan monash anymore...

surprise... i got a complaint post from someone... hahah... really surprising...

tonite, shrek 1 is showing... in the morning, i was thinking... ill jus stay home n watch it.. if he ask mi out (IF), i'll tell i wanna watch the show.

but... at this point.. i dunno... not even sure if he'll bother to ask.

not sure when i'll update again... perhaps when i'm better?

anyway, i went swimming sudenly on sat morning... saw someone who seem tob e from my unit, but he said not.

come to think of it (since i've kinda cooled down), my date seem to... still bother to treat mi as someone who he care for... but he... either dun wan to show it, or he's holding it back...

had promised to buy him a xmas gift... thinking abt the happy times, it kinda erased... or overwhelmed the bad ones... as for the unhappiness, i'll tok to him abt it...

but dun worry, i wun kill myself.. wun collapse... i not so easily defeated. i hope.

jus need time to recover myself... think n plan... hopefully it wun take too long...

had thot of not updating my blog for soemtime, or even, take it offline for a while... may or may not do it... wif my mood down the drain, dun quite have the intention to still update it...

going thru the downs of my life... lonely, r/s prob... , directionless, aimless, goaless.. esp when my date... seem to shower his care only when we are outside. dun seem to bother when we din meet, or toking on the phone... at times, i show my mood... by not toking much.. he jus ask "r u alright?" i nod. den he does not ask again.

or, past few days, i been so onzz to meet up wif him n tok.. but this time, i am totally inactive to meet up wif him.. even for bfast, i last min cancelled it... he dun even bother to ask if i alright... n show mi his attitude as well.

alright, for bfast, he did ask if i alright... i told him i'm fine. n he took it for real. come on, we'been going out for 1 mth... i've always been keen to meet up. if i cancelled it last min, am i really alright, or merely passing a remark???

he msg mi, i confirmed bfast wif him last night, yes. why i suddenly cancel it. i replied the same msg i sent earlier on. he said "understood". understood wat??

i actually thot he'll sense somethign's wrong n visit mi. know wat? when i msg him 30 mins later tat i wanan lunch wif him, he told mi he is meeting his close frns for lunch.

so, what's this???

i sent him, "have u cared abt my feeling, or wondered how i felt?" he told mi he'll ans mi when we meet for bfast tmr. now i've cancelled it suddenly. he's alright wif it.

Period.

somehow i feel tat my world is beginning to tumble... (rite word, correct?)

nevertheless, i still went on to join poly gathering... dozed off on the buss...

joined them for meal.. din feel like eating.. depression? dunno...

but they stayed there for quite long, so i still ate something there.. as i got hungry liao.

wah, got quite a few nice looking dudes siazz... LOL

din feel much like chatting... was more of a passive guy.. except at times, really cant bear, so i tok... then later went up to cafe to chat furhter,... spent the whle night there toking... wah, my frn once again tried to tok mi into going biz wif him siazz..

strange.. for these poly frns, i enver gave them my diary page... but for a close colleague of mine, i actually gave her... funny...

haha.. oh ya!!!!!!!!!! on my way home, wif those frns, got a guy who sittign opposite. i have been noticing him since he came onboard.

llong sleeve shirt, but folded up to elbow there. den his physique quite sturdy looking, excpe for perhaps flabby tummy...with his sleeve folded, he look quite manly n was wearing specs.. kinda like... sturdy guy in gentleman clothing.. LOL...

cos he sitting comfortably, i took out my hp cam, n poised to take pic.. but kauzz.. my frn "whispered" - wah, see yandao, wanna take pic.. how many u taken liao? - damn! wif his words, the guy took precaution, and leaned forward... damn it... big mouth...

den got home ,roommate left a msg for mi... well.... nothign to say...

n hopefully, this period of time, i dun require a shrink yet. most probably due to stress? not yet a nutcase...

i think i 'm feeling some emotions of mentally unbalanced... due to frns, r/s, studies, work, future...

finally decided to go for poly frns gathering... but may change mind later

jus came back from toilet... wah.. jus when i did my biz, a guy came into the toilet, he quite nice looking siazz... after washing my hands, i even stayed outside the toilet, waiting for him to coem out siazz!!

later, he did exit, n went into his office LOL.. i know where he is liao.. wha fancy doing such thigns.. waiting outside the toilet for him LOL

duno wat's come over mi... poly frns gathering.. not veli sure if wanna go anot... felt no motivation at all to go... frns' gathering? dun have the urge to go..

my life is experiencing its ups and downs... nothing much more to say abt my life.. got lotsa things to settle myself... studies, work, money, rented room, frns... 2005 gonna be my special yr.. cos dunno will b good or bad...

had a tok wif my close frn ytday, know i am supposed to do liaozz..

wanna call up a frn to check up on billing options... but thinking how i was kinda treated (although may jus b my imagination), i have 2nd thots abt calling him..

hehe.. now totally nothign to do... paper oso finish liaozz...

in my impression... it seem like my frns are all drifting apart.. i mean drifting away from mi... close frns are movignt o Oz for studies.. den a few hanging out frns... oso.. kinda.. spread till dun wan to call them oso... cos... they dun bother claling mi out... well.. alrigth... umm... nvm...

dunno... am i 2... emotional? really?

cos tmr is 1 mth anniversary.. called him out for meal or meeting.. he say got sore throat.. well we both like to surprise each other.. wonder if this is a surprise oso...

but if it is... i realyl wonder if i will like it... like.. give ... it's an anniversary to mi.. den he say he not free... spoil the meeting... i disappointed... if he show up later, i wonder if i will be surprised n happy.... really...

maybe dun like such... unhappy n disappointing surprise? dunno...

hehe... my first month anniversary for dating...

mon at last min, i managed to get a frn.. hehe.. a master :) to go wif mi.. hurried to book tic... den mon night... wat i was doing huh? not exactly sure... nvm...

den tuesday came, haha.. i actually planned to take half day off from work.. urgent type.. jus to go see my amei./.. went off at 430 to see her.. reached vic hall at 6+. sighzz.. due to last min changes, my frn n i was separated. end up in the hall.. we oso separated...

anyway, when amei came out, we screamed as usual... but somehow, i got a feeling this is her farewell concert... and the bad thign is, we cant stand up... muz b seated....

odd... she was singing live yesterday, but her voice.. seem to have lost the moods... fast songs she sure can.. but slow ballads, she does not seem to have the mood to sing them.. she can stil project the emotions, but the touch is not there it seems... her soul seem not there liaozz...

den tok dinner wif the frn... n he sent mi to the busstop... got home, roommate sleeping liaozz...

den suddenly, my date msg mi he feeling down... n wanna go bfast tmr morning... n my family oso say morning bfast cancelled... so i agreed...

den hor, next morning, went over.. hahah.. he jus woke up!!! den he came down n took bfast wif mi.. nc hatted a bit.. hehe.. can feel tat he hinting something :D later he wanna go up to rest again.. n i immediately told him abt wat i think of those short emets...

so he made up by going out wif mi... hehe.. while he went back to prepare, i took the time to buy some health stuff for him.. haha.. he was touched :)

den after tat, i hurried home for family dinner... n after dinner... went to find him again... when i was shoppign wif date, i told him... i needed to go off at 12mn... den he dun get my meaning.. hehe. nvm loh.. n had intended to go chiong... but later frn cancelled it.

oh ya, in morning, wnana call frns out for chiong, but they all had gone the night b4... liaozz.. go chiong never ask mi.. win loh... i displeased liaozz...

den after going out wif date (wah, my diary this time is pretty messed up!!! hahah), i rushed home to iron my clothes for the week... hehe...

well, on saturday, cos fri nite, my date really made mi kinda mad... he was veli aplogetic... ask mi for bfast... he din plan where, n wan mi plan as well. at last we met up.. i totally mad at him.. dun feel like toking at all for the whole morning, i din tok at all... he oso kinda bochap... he jus keep apologising... but i not looking for tat!! sorry dun cure!

when ppl are mad, do they expect a mere apology??

later, he keep asking if i dun like this/tat.. but never get to the gist.. liaozz.. den i shouted i wanna sit down n tok.. dunno if he heard.,,, later he almost wanna go home... we got to mrt.. i simply walked away. he followed den i blasted out - wat is happening to us now??? he dun bother to ask wat i thinking, or wat caused the silence in mi....

but thigns went on well in the end haha..

he was tired so went home sleep.. i went home to do my Pc stuff oso.. n later... ehhe .. some interesting stuff hapened ;)

alone in the room,
trying hard to control my tears
they still came down eventually
what's wrong with me?????

why am i so the damn fucking emotional????????????????????????//

damn.. saw the conversion rate for Oz is pretty good.. but 2 bad still muz go down inperson to do it... gonna do it tmr... err... ya tmr... hopefully will get a good rate

last night, went for buffet dinner at some *dunno real or not* high class restaurant. supposed to be international. but the food is so.... asian... oh ya, outside the restaurant, the menu is written as jap n chinese.. but kauzz.. international?? for asian cuisine?? might as well write "asian buffet" or "inter-asian" even better...

hehe inside there, got 2 cute waiters... alright, jus 1.. the other is nice looking... but tat cute waiter.. seem like on duty for short while oni.. if not, muz b serving the guests inside the conf room..

toking abt the nice looking waiter, whenever he pass by, i sure look at him... den.. got 1 time, need him to clear up some dishes.. he clear up, den we joked with him, he giggled haha.. saw his smile LOL...

den carrying my FULL stomach, i went home... but when got home, i concuss liao.. simply dun wan bath or anything, jus laid on bed n dozed off...

strange.. or rather nvm, cos thot rommate may have at least woken mi up, tell mi my lens is still on.. n last night, my sleep pattern is unusual oso.. head is on other end of bed. n din clear up much n jus slept..

abt 2+, i woke up (LUCKILY!!), and cleaned myself up.. den use PC for a while.. strange lei... my mails.. if use NAV to scan incoming, no host is found. if dun use, den can.. funnie... but phew, later i still woke up on time for work!

haha.. ytday i went to toilet.. den on my way there, got stench of cigar... felt it so disgusting!! den as i got into toilet, there was another smell - chlorine. haha.. i felt it's much better!! LOL... *sperm is the smell... i thot*

come home, jus did things myself... fixed my shoes... he offer to help ,but i dun accept... stubborn, yes.. so? later, i went to fix my pc... he indeed changed his user to power user... so can install his stuff.. i changed back.

den he fixing my shoes for mi... i bochap...

den this morning, i woke up, changed, and saw he din cover his calf with blanket, so i helped him.. he woke up...

last night, as i reading my book (after fixing my shoe), he oso sat before mi, staring... i din bother.

ytday was quite an ok day.. took quite a number of calls...

date is busy with his work... so went home to watch charmed... kauz.. my rommmate is using my account in the computer. if he use tat, then wat the pt of having 2 diff accts??? his acct got restrictions, so he freely use mine?? den wat the pt of creating tat acct??

i din log off in the morning, so tat i cna do things... den he oso dun wna log off... kauzz... reboot my pc...

den this morning..roommate really went off for work.. n he bought instant noodles oso... heeh.. hope he can keep the good work up LOL...

dunno why, this mornign i pretty happy.. good mood.. on wayu to work, i cna even hum songs isazz... but i still thinking abt my future...............

work was as usual... and as relaxing as usual... tok to a online frn, checking wif him the current programmign mart.. damn jialut.. cos the influx of china n indian ppl.. shld i go to Oz? So that it will be the same scenario for mi? influx of asians into Western?

But as a citizen, i shld have better chance right? If not, perhaps i go into local / MNC / govt places loh sighzz!!!

den after work, went to join my frns for some events... umm.. quite ok lah... jus tat, too bad my family dun support it...

had wnana go n visit my date, but he dun wan lei.. he is sick.. den dun wan mi go.. ok loh.. let him rest...

oh ya... the hair dressing session...

got a new shampoo staff... he dun look fantastic, but merely a moderate thin guy... jus tat his hair quite havoc. wah liao... thot of having haircut, but the hairdresser suggested i still color my hair... i told her i wnana bright color.. she said color dull, den highlight bright... will be better... alright loh.. in all $91!!!

but hor, maybe they busy, they din do anything when the fallen hair landed on my pants.. siughzz...

woke up... mon morning... err... rommmate supposed to work liao... but.. why he no need go out? nvm, went for work... but later... DAMN IT!! i suddenly develop headahce in mid day!!!

liaozz... take MC will be a waste liao lerzz!! decide to challenge myself n eat to my fill... wanna resist the headache, or rathe fight the headache with food!

few hrs later, headache improve liao. .. hehe.... called my date, tell him abt headache, he ask abt my condition.. n i murmured sweet nothings to him~!! he den say he toking serious stuff... haah... i played along "i oso toking serious matters.." he giggled!

den asked him out for movie... ya i watched this show liao, but it not bad, n he din watch yet.. so y not? called another frn out... he joined us too... thot rommmate will sure follow suit.. hahah.. true enuff... he din come out cos he going to soccer game haha...

in the cinema, date's laughter was quite cute n amusing.. at times quite horrible!! LOL...

den sent him home... n i went back to sleep... frn did ask mi wat made mi so angry i dun wanna tok to roommate.. well why shld he bother to find out?

oh, this rmonign, he did wake up

sunday morning, he had wnana take bfast wif mi... but 2 bad, i got family bfast... after bfast, had wanna fix the new DVD player at family, but no chance to. At night, after dinner, got home n saw roommate there.. wah, at home so fast??

slept till next mornign... din tok a line..

at my place, bought wine, and snacks over... when back at home, wah, he tidied up the place siazz.. n while i fixing PC, he was resting on the bed... eheh...

then comes mornign...

oh ya... ytday at the movies.. cos kinda late, din have proper meal... so went to buy the movie combo meals.. den went home.. felt not hungry, so din take anything.. liaozz.. in the end, in the morning, i felt my tummy groan.. den early in morning, rushed to toilet to relieve myself... went to take bus to work, den on way oso tummy problem... finally.. got to work n tummy still problem ehre there.. sianzz...

went to neighbourhood for dinner.. wah say, he willing to pay 20++ / person siazz!! and had a fun and fulfiling dinner!! teased him a few times... but atlas, we went to a shop where i saw wat my ex bought for mi... damn sad... stayed for a while, n got pretty down... went out of shop to relax n calm down....

took a few minutes to get over.. was quite down tat time... thot my date will actually convince mi to say wat's wrong with mi... but nope... i know i wun tell him directly, or even keep saying "i'm fine"... but well.. alrigth, it takes time for him to know mi...

den later, worse, as we window shopped, he was gazing at the condoms n were so damn excited abt it... saying things like "wah, this is new design!!!".. who cares.. it dun bother mi... i never use them.. why bother telling mi?

den, strangely, i met my ex in the sports shop... was quite stunned, and surprised to see him.. almost wanna hug him... toked a bit.. nah, he dun wna exchange nubmers...

den i joined back my date.. toked as usuall.. den went down to sit... i know he tired, so i walked faster to find a seat for him.. den, suddenly i lost him! i turned around, n saw him somewhere in the back. wah liaozz.. asked mi where to sit, i pointed the floor at him... then i jus walked str8 to fast food place to sit down...

toked to him as usuall... den haha.. i teased him.. cos he said "ya, i know i not handsome enuff... u oni playing wif mi", then i replied "is my acting skills so bad???" hahah.. made him pretty pissed siazz!!

den he decided to come my place for the night.. god knows wat he thinking..

den later, i went home to reformat my PC... smooth reformat.. surprisingly haha...

den install thing properly oso.. everythign download new things... hehe.. everythign quite smooth, less those stil need testing type.. but how come hor, my videos still got problems editing har??

den evening tiem, recv msg from my date tat he free for the evening.. hehe.. i promptly rushed out.. he told mi he at the platform waiting liao... i went up, found him sitting there waiting for mi.. wah, kauzz.. wat if i get there late lei? den oso, he din even plan where to go dinner when he wnana go nmet mi upstairs... anyway, we did go for our dinner in the end...

update later...

saturday.. checkec my pc.. but nothing much wat...

thot something drastic... perhaps before rebooting, something drastic happened. anyway, early morning, woke up at 9.. saw my date's sms... heeh.. asking mi for bfast!! i immedialtey called to arrange... went off for bfast then... umm, from my place, take bus is fastter... but he more used to mrt.. ok loh..

but end up walk a long way. till he complained.. then.. during the bfast, hehe.. chatted loh.. n enjoyed the meal. after tat, he wanna go home rest. advised him to come my place, at least can rest more. but he dun wan.. saying later still need to go home n change before going out. up to him loh.. i wanna send him home, but he INSISTED he dun wan..

continue later...

we went for a chat in nearby pub... quite nice place.. den my date finished course n wan join us!!! hehe.. while waiting for him, i ordered a drink which name sounded nice... haha, in end, i was teased tat it's lady's drink. DAMN@!!!

den he came, n we chatted... hehe.. his eng not tat gd.. so as i toking to my frns he unable to join.. wah liaozz, we were damn loud.. chatting every single thing in the world.. n my frns were pretty outspoken siazz.. hahah.. so fun to chat wif bosom frns.. jus a handful of them, my day passed easily.

the day was quite enjoyable loh :)

den went for our dinner at a fastfood. my date dun wanna eat such food, den later i accompanied him back to his house for dinner.. wah, our chats (wif frns) are so humourous siazz.. n witty... LOL...

den, strangely, i acutally met 2 of my poly frns siazz.. tat long time no see.. 1 is a ger, who switched from IT to teaching siazz..

den met HI frns.. tat CUTE GUY!! he happily married to his gf since sec days.. COOL.... den took dinner n went home... at home..

soemthing drastic happened to my PC. .dunno wat yet.. din see properly...

den thurs, quite enjoyable day.. at work.. still the same sianz attitude...

work halfday.. den went home to prepare my things.. roommate is there oso.. but we din tok at all.. umm... hwo come hor, till now, i still tok about him har? why do i still bother to mention??? i dunno too...

i prepared n left for haircut... planned to meet frn at 330pm, orignally, my timing is correct, but the haircut was delayed i mean, pro-longed... or.. nvm... the time taken was longer than usual. in end, i was late for meeting my good frn who came back from Oz... heeh.. but i kept on lying to her abt my timing.. wah liaozz, i know i can't lie for long, but jus wanna delay it... den when i got there, she blasted at mi hahah.. as expected... n i was again the "hen-pecked" guy haha...

met up, toked n proceed to orchard to meet other frn of mine... wah, damn fun n exciting siazz!!! cos somehow, she really tat kind of precise timing ever since she came back from Oz.. so.. for mi, she gave a grace of 10 min to get there haha... for my frn, wah even worse.. even countdown to the secs. but was fun.. cos really rushing to meet the timeline haha..

den finally we met up, she demanded explanation... n things went on as usual...

hehe.. ytday, was doing halfday, n answering calls, so din update at all.

hehe. these days, been spending time with my date so much haha.. everyday is a new day to me.. can i say i feel happier? but due to having ppl (read: date) accompany mi to places or interests, to tok, or to kill time? not sure abt tat... the point of having a bf.. is to share your troubles, woes... and ideas, thots, happiness, and ur time right?

anyway, wednesday night.. he came over to my palce, haha.. we seem to enjoy giving surprises siazz... he said he tired from work, den i jus KO'ed, so i told him... alright, when he said he tired from work while we discussing plan later, i felt tat he... kinda no wish to plan to meet... i was disappointed for a moment.. but later, as minutes (read, it's minutes not while) passed, i soon wnana think the good side..

den later, i KO, n msg him i going over to look for him.. wah liao, he replied he coming my place right now haha.. so i msg him, alright i going back home... haha... den hor, i ask him where he is, he dun dare say hahah...

met up wif him, n enjoyed time.. but heheh.. got some hiccups here and there stil lah.. but things still went on fine haha..

later he even came over my place... n I FED HIM!!!! FED HIM WAT I BOUGHT.. FOR MYSELF HAHA

a cool day~!!

somehow, really dun feel like toking to rommamte... morning, he sms mi something. i read. no response from em at all.

then, late noon, frn sms mi same thing, i called back. den he passe dhp over to rommmate. no wish to tok to him, i asked for my frn back to hp... not giving him any chance to speak to him. he also commented to frn tat i wanna speak to frn. correct. true. no wish to speak to him.

had dinner ... err.. jus checked my blog for yesterday's entry... wah. even i myself was confused siazz!! wah... tuesday entry said i had dinner.. err... but i had wanna write tuesday stuff.. wah, finally i understood tat, tuesday stuff is toking about the night before siazz.. *blush*

tuesday night, after knocking off, had a nice chat wif colleagues to discuss issues. den went for gathering dinner wif sec sch frns.. wah.. the traffic jam quite siong... had wanna go for cheap dinner.. but they choose buffet dinner of 30++$.. dinner not bad.. or rather jus alright..

rommmate msg mi, he not coming back.. so wat? used to it, and dun bother mi at all...