luv_ktv's untold moments

hell came over mi.

for the past 3 days, i've been ... wanting myself to stay up n carry on my monash asgt. but.. i everytime jus sleep in the midway. like.. jus lie on the bed, n i dozed off in secs. yes i know it means i'm tired.. but i really need to keep myself awake! fwe days liao.. sianz.. almost felt useless.. n hopeless..

den at work.. sometimes, i'll feel "there's really no pt working there anymore.. i shld seek other java jobs". sometimes, i'll feel "i muz stay behind.. cos it's really my dream job". sighzz.. anyway, i realyl feel so disappointed wif myself. a few simples bugs, i took hours to find out n resolve. damn it. i failed my own expectations..

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did the going get tuff? on last night, i set my hp to buzz at 4am. when i woke at 651, i was stunned. and found that the buzz was not on. 2 reasons: i did not set it on, or i din wake up to its buzz. but i'm still determined to complete my asgt ASAP. now i understand the stress of studying n working at the same time. in my prev helpdesk jobs, we mainly.. stress during some major issues like "downtime" but that's just temporarily, cos we oni care abt when it'll b up, n demand for a report. but now, as a SOFTWARE ENGINEER, i am in charge of a product/project, n i WANNA see it thru. putting in extra effort is not an issue for mi.. provided i finish my asgt..

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blogging still? yes.. while i preparing my asgt.. ok, as i get more involved in a proper worklife (doing my dream java programming job), i begin to realise why.. in tis century, less couple r getting married, n the need for matching agencies.. every1 is so caught up wif the working life, and earning more money.. n wif earning of more money, the spending power increases. ppl have higher expectations of their life partners, be it guys or gals. wif higher expectations, it's getting more diffi to be aattached...

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taking a rest from my asgt... n watched a korean show on tv. the scene is about the guy who woke up to find himself in a hotel room, sleeping naked on the bed. a ger is standing by the window. ok, i'm not sure how this could have happened in real life, but why is it tat, every person will assume the guy did something to teh ger?? it's a common assumption! Other than the guy being honry, won't the ger feel shamed too? if the ger is unwilling, wun she resist? or, if the ger is forced onto the bed, wun the ger wake up crying or feeling helpless? if the ger is feeling "well, dun bother abt mi, i know we are not fated, but i enjoyed tat nite", does this not mean somethign fishy? why are the guys always the agressor and the ger always the victim?

i've nvr been drunk b4, and wun bed a ger. does pure intimacy on teh bed stain the ger (in the mindset of the current century)? or some evidence of action will then prove the staining? if the guy is really drunk, can he still feel the sexual contact?

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last para, b4 i post tis blog.
for this assignment, it seems like those mathematical questions will tend to stress mi out and burn my brain cells, while those questions which ask for elaborations and researching will be much easier.. cos' it's basically ur understanding of the topic, and some research, and not based on how well the lecturer has taught, and how much u've grasped from wat was taught.. u dun need to scratch ur head to determine how is the formula actually derived, used, and wat values to apply...