luv_ktv's untold moments

about work:
went to sign the letter liao luh!! but.. the start date is 22mar. my official last day is 23. but i intend to clear my leave on 22n23. boss say ok. oni scared last min they break promise.

valentine day:
wat's exactly going on?

i had confidence n know wat i am doing when i arrange for apptmts. but today, when i tried to arrange for 1, i got EMOTIOANLLY CHARGED. i am so worried tat the time wud not suit the schedule, n whether i am confident of getting the seat.

i have 1 restaurant in mind. but i'm knocking off at 8pm. the restaurant will b packed (by std timing, let alone 14th feb). packed till i not sure, or even no chance that by 8pm, seats still available. but i know, the dinner mus still go on. i went to the jap restaurant below my office. wah, EX n abnormal menu. but i booked the seat for 2 at 7pm.

it's SO werid n insincere n evil if i ask my date to chop a seat, n wait for mi there. i'm initiating the dinner, n yet ask him wait for mi?? no way.

i den thot of changing the time to lunch instead. wah, i seriously dunno if the time can match. will it b 2 rushing??

for a moment, .... i felt tat, i'm losing control of myself. totally. where is the confident mi?? the confident person who knwo wat he's doing, n y he's doing it? i'm getting too much into the appointment. thinking of planning the appointment, but no confidence of whether i'm setting the correct time or not.

oh well, perhaps it's supposed to b a relaxed n "casual" dinner, but if it's too crowded, it may not be tat enjoyable after all, which is not wat shld happen.

perhaps the fear of doing something not rite is getting inot mi. too much, into mi. it's nice, but definitely not gd in the long run. i will become a crybaby. n a decision-asker, instead of maker.

1 thing i can confirm, i dun think i'm treating it as a mere meal. more to the start of a process to knwo a person better. if i'm emotionally charged, i may think too personally, not able to see the full pic.

as i went to get some water, during the walking, i actually felt the emotional strain. the pressure of acceptance. for a long time, i've not experienced 2 sides of mi. or rather, for the first time. 1 is emotionally charged mi. 1 is the confident mi. i'm waiting for a confirmation sms for timing.

1 side of mi says, is the person alright? shld i call to check? why no reply sms yet?
1 side of mi says, well, i'm waiting for a confirmation sms. wat is there to worry?