Wednesday, June 15, 2005

so now's today's post. last night, i slept at 1230. or is it 130? cos i heheh.. once again... err, am i proud of it, or jus open abt my acts? well, i JO'ed :) den morning, i woke at 624am but got off bed at 702am. din feel awake. why har? maybe if i ever wake up earlier i shld try to get off bed to see if i still tired or wat.

right now, i still got 4 chapters to finish up. hehe, today, i did a few things whcih wil help to improve our work. 1, i suggested something. 2, i saw there's a flaw in system, n discussed with my team. =D well, today, 2 bad, guy is not aroound, den snr i think stil dun wan lunch wif mi oni. anyway, i went to buy money order first. the lady, or old or 30+ 40 lady, was there. wah liao, i ask her wat name i shld write as the benefit. she keep saying make sure it's the correct name of the place. den she had the cheeck to tell mi i dun have enuff money for order. HUH?? she den went off to do things, n i had wnana go for lunch first, but they say will be ready.

oh gosh, i reported loss of bank book some time back. den now they say without it,cant proceed. n wanna replace, muz pay 15$ admin. gosh. dun think i wanna pay for somethign tat i wun use .will find a way out. but the whole process took 30mins!!! when, if an exp taff do, oni 10 mins!!! waste my time! so my first time to lunch at 130pm :P i msg a guy, but he din reply yet til this late hr still not yet. hurried back to work. by this mth, i MUZ buy new pants. shirt is optional.

den at work, my colleagues mentioned about those sexual stuff. haha, i'm not out n open to them about myself. i feel so entrapped. sighzz... is this how a closetted guy feel? to the stage i feeel i always hiding soemthing from them. alright, they are pretyt open abt the sexual stuff. gay les, anal plug, lubricnt. oral. inches. i wonder if it's alright for mi to suddenly come out to them. cos they tok ger guy sex stuff, i nothingt o say. n i no sex jokes to tok. but i AM paiseh'ed by some terms they use haha.

den later, tiem to KO. somehow i wonder if my boss still being hostile to mi. cos today got snr n young lady leave early. when i wanna leave early (in probation period), he say muz at least inform him weeks back. den i went to meet my boi. ahah, will send him to gym every odd day. hahah. we never get tired of meeting each other daily!!! LOL. we can always tok some crappy nonsense haha..

um,m, a confession. these days, at times, i seem to lose control of my eyes. i sometimes will tend to look at guys siazz.. but hor, i do have soemthign to tell my boi, 2 bad no chance... esp when he became moody.. he calle dmi during charmed On-air timing. almost din wanan pick. but i din realise tat, at his 2nd time mentining of him facing problem, i coudl actually suggest to rush down in cab to find him, skippign my charmed. i rmb from "hermia" and "lysander" that, "course of true love never runs smooth". but muz it happen so fast?? is this supposed to be a test? set by... heaven? heaven refer to 2 thigns :)

but no mater wat i hope my boi will ge tover things. dun wan blog too late... reply hsi comments another day.

i know the line is mushy, but...
I believe we are meant to be together. Listen to this song: Des'ree - You Gotta Be. Pay attention to the chorus.


1 last thing, somehow when something mess up my mood, i really.. have a little trouble getting over it. unless soemone who know mi break it for mi. my boi claled mi to tok. i was askin him 1 thing. den he "hinted" mi the answer. but to mi, that's no answer loh. say = din say. n he carried on toking abt other thignss. i still ding et reply to my first qn. watever he say, i oni "ok". cos i still stuck at first topic, waiting a proper reply. whne he finally told mi, i at loss of wat to say liaozz.. not sure if he's enjoying time wif his frn, till he din pay attention to my question?

oh ya, now i finally agree wif my boi,. he once told mi, i'm a peanut/durian. my appearance look intimidating n fierce, but if u really get to know mi better, u'll see the good side of mi. born an introvert, (i think when got time, i put tis part inside my hpg oso) i am trying to break out of my no-frn situation. but without the proper social skills, i somethimes try too hard. i either tried 2 hard to be easy going, protective of myself, or too open for ppl to accept. perhaps i'm easily influenced by my company? if the ppl around mi r in serious tone, i'll be. i they are in cheerful mood, i'll crap wif them too...

1 comment:

W79 said...

haha... I think dardar is proud to announce abt the JO loh. As to whether u r open or not, I choose to believe that u r always open abt such things. haha...

It's ok to pay $15 for the bank book lah. Save a lot of problem that way too especially if u lose ur atm card. I thot dar saw some nice pants some time back and u plan to buy it? Go shopping with me loh. hehe...

Pls dun open urself to ur colleagues yet cos u r not sure how they would react. Just join in the fun and act curious on some of the terms or names they use loh. I am sure when it comes to sex stuff, no one can beat u. haha... just joking lah...

It's so sweet of dardar to send me to gym every odd day loh. Muackz. Always so nice to meet dardar up even to chat for a few minutes. hehe...

I am sort of getting used to u looking at guys liao and dun think u would be able to change this over time so yah... go ahead with it loh. Maybe I shd take up ur habit as well so we can look at guys together next time. Dar thinks too much liao lah. U shd know that I seldom call u unless it's really urgent. Just wanted to talk to someone so I can calm down and yah... u r the closest to me liao....

No lah, I m just tired and it was alrdy quite late so I didn't pay much attention to ur question in the sense that I didn't give a proper answer. Would take that into notice this time round and improve on it next time. hehe...

Dun remember I ever mention that u r peanut/durian loh but it's true that dardar looks fierce and it takes time for u to break down and mix around with the crowd. Huggies... I know that my dardar is the best lah...

Anyway, Dec mentioned that u look gd to him and he commented that u r a very nice guy and he can sense that u would be very nice to me. In short, he's happy for me that I got u as my bf. hehe... I am also happy that I got such a nice bf like u loh. Muackz... I love u...